On Sunday I taught a Relief Society lesson on the atonement. It kind of fell flat, and to top it off, half of the cookies I baked for people were burnt. Thankfully everyone thought that was funny (at least until they bit into the cookies).
Also, I cried in Sunday school. The lesson was on the Proclamation on the Family, which I am not on board with (or at least I have major issues with parts of it), and on Elder Oaks’ recent talk, which was the only conference talk I have ever flat out disagreed with. The teacher was really nice when I choked through my comment and said it was okay to feel that way.
After church Abe had visits and home teaching, and all I wanted to do was nap. When Abe came home he walked all around with Clarissa so I could take a quick nap before making dinner.
Abe and I both went to bed dreading the week. Abe is frightened because this is the last week of the quarter and he has so much yet to bill. I am frightened because each day feels so hectic and demanding. Ammon alone could keep me fully occupied all day, but Clarissa would also like full attention all day, and she doesn’t ever take real naps. She’ll cat nap for five minutes or twenty minutes maybe three times a day, totaling maybe an hour–or two at most–of sleep between 7am and 8pm.
Abe vows we will sleep train her after Christmas, but I don’t like letting her cry for too long yet. The times I have let her cry for a longer period of time make me feel really bad afterward. She usually is shaking and desperate, and I don’t like to see her in such a state.
Anyway, on top of Clarissa and Ammon there are two other kids who also need attention and help, not to mention food needs to be cooked, messes need tidying, and there’s always, always so much laundry to wash, dry, fold, and put away. It’s really crazy right now.