changed sheets – Darais Days

fix-it cut, the aviary, and Provo

This day was the kind of day that made me stop and feel grateful to be a stay at home mom. I enjoyed each part of the day. Even though I dropped Lydia off half an hour late to preschool, I didn’t panic (like I normally would) and feel like a terrible mom. I just figured I was doing my best, I didn’t yell at the girls to hurry, and the timing kind of fell where it did. What will be will be–I should have that attitude more often!

While Lydia was at preschool, I took Mary to Cookie Cutterz to get her haircut fixed, and then we went to the Aviary.

The store was selling lice deterrent leave in conditioner. Of course, I bought some. Apparently, rosemary is even better than tea tree at deterring lice. Duly noted. I will remember to ask Santa for a jug of Rosemary essential oils this Christmas.

Then we picked Lydia up and came home. While the girls were down for quiet time, I napped and researched essential oils, salt lamps, house plants, and diffusers. The experience I had with lice has made me very interested in homeopathic remedies, and now I’m convinced the reason we stay sick six months out of the year is because our home is filled with toxins. This winter I am going to invest in some of the above things and see if perhaps we stay healthier for it.

After daydreaming about filling my home with salt lamps, I dragged myself out of bed and folded laundry for an hour. It’s all folded! Just in time for more loads tomorrow! But hey, I will take it.

Then I loaded the girls in the car and drove to Provo. Abe’s work gave everyone free flu shots/nose sprays. After getting our sprays and shots, we drove to Abe’s friends’ house. Morgan and Jesse bought a house with my dream backyard in Provo, and Abe has been wanting to show it to me for a while. Afterward we drove around their neighborhood. We have looked at neighborhoods more than a few times since Abe transferred jobs, but we never find anything that seems to compare with how much we love the avenues. However, today we found a great neighborhood that resonated. It’s good to know that there are places in Provo where we won’t be abjectly miserable!

We sped home so I could be in time for my meeting…which went so well! I can’t put my finger on what it was, but I actually enjoyed the meeting. Perhaps I felt like I had more to contribute tonight, or I came away with legitimate action items that made me feel useful; whatever it was, I was grateful for an experience with my calling that made me like it more.

While I was at my meeting, Abe took pictures of the girls playing with their Happy Meal paraphernalia from Provo:

And now we’re going to finish Stardust! I can’t wait. I had nightmares about the witches last night, but I still really want to find out what happens to everybody.

Lice crazy and Too Much Information (after the pics)

Did I neglect to mention in my last post that after we thought Mary was the only person with lice, Abe discovered a ton of nits in my hair Friday night? Yeah, I thought so. Between that time and now, my hair has undergone: RID (scary, ineffective pesticide treatment), multiple sessions of nit comb-throughs, LiceFree! Spray, three blow-dry treatments (so hot and long that I thought my scalp would burn off), two tea-tree oil shampoo washes, a priesthood blessing, and right now: I have soaked 1/4 cup of pure tea tree oil into my scalp. Tome gave me an 8 ounce bottle, bless his heart. Oh, and I’ve laundered my sheets every day since Thursday.

From Amazon, arriving soon are these three exciting products: A Robi comb (a battery charged comb that zaps lice with electricity so that they die on contact), a Terminator comb (best lice comb on the market!), and a giant VAT of tea-tree oil shampoo.

All of last night’s dreams revolved around picking lice off of my head. Do I sound crazy and obsessed? That’s about how I feel. Poor Abe just wants a break, but every time we have a spare moment, I hand him a comb and order him to get to work on my hair. While he does that I pore over the Amazon reviews of different lice products and read them like it’s therapy. Most people write their terrifying lice stories into their review and send words of encouragement and support to the review reader. The reviews make me feel like I have a global support group.

When I am not actively combating lice, I perform tasks in a distracted state and have several times thought I might be losing my mind. Case in point: Yesterday, after forgetting a bag of groceries at the store, I went out and climbed back into the passenger seat of the car and sat there for a minute before I realized the car wasn’t going to drive itself back to the store.

Okay, enough about lice (even though, honestly, that’s basically all I think about). Today was General Conference! A welcome, uplifting, four hour distraction. One of my favorite talks was Elder Holland’s about caring for the poor. I also liked Elder Bednar’s talk on missionary work. He pointed out that the reason we do missionary work is because we have felt that power of the atonement in our own lives and desire the same blessing for others. That’s kind of how I feel about LiceFree! Spray and tea tree oil–I want to share the info with EVERYONE so no one else has to go through the panic and icky pesticides I used before figuring out which products worked. Oops! I wasn’t going to write more about lice…

I’ll just cut to the pictures:

Lydia and I made this plum cake today. I needed a pick-me-up. I should have taken a picture...but guess what? I have enough plums to make it again tomorrow, so maybe I'll just do that since this one disappeared. — Lydia and I made this plum cake today. I needed a pick-me-up. I should have taken a picture…but guess what? I have enough plums to make it again tomorrow, so maybe I’ll just do that since this one disappeared. Also, doesn’t my hair look like a perfect home for lice? I would chop it all off, but no salon can legally do that for me until this ordeal is over, at which point I will probably reconsider.

I discovered Mary reading Each Peach, Pear, Plum while the plum cake was baking.

Tom and Suzanne came over for dinner. Tom gave Abe a blessing afterwards.

I love the mountains in the background. Of course, I also find the little girl in the foreground quite endearing as well.

Also, here’s a daily dose of Too Much Information: After I spent all that time in the hospital with my friend Andrea, who had to deliver her stillborn daughter, I decided I wanted to get pregnant again. Maybe it’s because I wanted the baby to be alive, or maybe it’s because I love spending time in Labor and Delivery (really, I love that floor of the hospital), but I emerged from that experience wanting, for the first time in two years, to be pregnant again. Didn’t happen the first month (which was really about two weeks before my period came), and now I have soaked my hair twice in pesticides, so I think I’ll give my body another couple months to get these chemicals out of its system before trying again. Sad.

On the upside, I have a couple classes left on my Bikram yoga pass, so I can at least use those up now! (I can’t while trying to get pregnant because the heat isn’t good for in-utero babies).

My new cleaning pal

This morning I took it slow. Other than getting a run in on the treadmill, I basically did nothing all morning (aside from keeping the girls alive).

Things picked up after quiet time, though. Lydia and I shucked corn, and I almost wilted in the heat. Afterward we retreated back into the house for a cooking, cleaning, and laundry marathon.

After Abe came home, we ate dinner and played a vigorous game of chase.

Then we went to Target to buy this dreamy device:

A carpet and hardwood floor scrubber/steamer! 1000 scrubs per minute! Lightweight! I can't wait to try it tomorrow!!!! — A carpet and hardwood floor scrubber/steamer! 1000 scrubs per minute! Lightweight! I can’t wait to try it tomorrow!!!!

Abe is downstairs duck taping the bag for our old vacuum. We don’t have replacement bags since it is over two decades old, and in order for my steamer to work, you need to follow up with a vacuum. Buying a new vacuum is next on our list. (Actually, we intended to buy a new vacuum today, but I got seduced by the steamer.)

911

At 5:54 am I awoke to the sound of the front door slamming. Abe leaves for work at 5:30 these days, and so I was terrified that someone was in the house. I crept to the stairs and heard light switches going on and off in the house. Convinced there was someone inside, I called 911.

Twenty minutes later, a team of six policemen swarmed the house, only to discover…nothing. I felt so dumb. But I honestly did hear the door slam, and I heard another door slam right before the police arrived. Since Abe and I are missing two full sets of keys, we had all the locks changed today just to be safe. Abe has promised to deadbolt the door behind him when he leaves for work.

To be honest, I still haven’t quite recovered from the adrenaline rush that accompanied lying in bed whispering on the phone with 911 for twenty minutes. It was terrible. I haven’t felt safe since. Also, I’m stressed out that I call 911 so much. This was my fourth call in two and a half years. If I operated 911, I would stop responding to my number’s calls. “Oh, it’s just the hystrionic lady in the Avenues who always thinks she’s under attack. Let’s respond to someone who actually NEEDS help…”

The only times I’ve forgotten the scare today were 1) visiting teaching Marilyn this morning and 2) having dinner with my mission friend, Jen! She’s from France, but her husband is American and they’ve been living in D.C. for the past five years. Jen was a director at Miriam’s kitchen during that time, and the experiences she shared uplifted us so much. We were so inspired by Jen and Chris’s passion for community and homeless-outreach.

Now that they’ve moved to Salt Lake, I’m looking forward to spending more time with Jen. She was also mission companions in Las Vegas with one of Abe’s high school friends, and so for our next get together we’re going to invite the Maudsleys over for dinner and let Katie and Jen reconnect. It’s been almost ten years since our missions!

Here’s a photo Abe took at the end of dinner. Chris was also taking pictures, and Jen and I are each looking at our hubby’s phone.

the dentist and the perfect ending

This morning I hustled the girls through breakfast and out the door so we could pick up Rose, Tainah and Seve. We headed to the Aviary for a quick, early morning bird watch.

Feeding the ducks, a favorite activity of each child involved.

Then we raced to pick up Kate, a babysitter, so I could make it to yoga. We were late, though, so I missed yoga. I consoled myself by swimming at my favorite outdoor pool in Salt Lake. It was glorious. One of my favorite parts was this older gentleman who swam in my lane (it was a larger end lane) with his head out of water and his eyes closed. He swerved all over, and I almost bumped into him a couple of times. He was darling.

I took a fifteen minute break after my swim to lie in the sun and look at the mountains. The pool feels like it’s right under the mountains, and I felt so happy. I prayed a lot, although I kept losing focus because the sunshine and mountains were beautiful and distracting. I ended up with a sunburn.

Then I picked Isabella up and dropped Kate off. I ate a hurried lunch with Mary and left the girls with Isabella so I could go to my first dentist appointment in two years. Affordable babysitting has changed my life.

After the appointment, I raced home again to pick Lydia up. We have been losing so much stuff in the Darais household. So far we’re missing: two sets of house AND car keys, my phone, and Lydia’s ballet clothes. I couldn’t find the clothes anywhere, so with twenty minutes to go before her lesson, we dashed to Target, bought new clothes, arrived at the studio, changed Lydia into her new clothes, and ran to her class–two minutes late.

They make it hard to see the kids so the parents won't gawk and distract the kids. I gawk anyway (through the blinds). Lydia's the only one in a black leotard. — They make it hard to see the kids so the parents won’t gawk and distract the kids. I gawk anyway (through the blinds). Lydia’s the only one in a black leotard.

Lydia followed directions better this time, but she reminds me so much of myself. I feel like I spend a lot of life feeling like I have no idea what’s going on. That’s basically Lydia in ballet, most of the time. The teacher had to give her special instructions at several points because even though she tries to pay attention, she day dreams and gets distracted. As I watch her, I feel so much empathy. I remember when I was in marching band and the band leader called me out for marching my own routine in the middle of half-time. I guess spacing out runs in the family.

Then we came home, cooked and ate dinner, bought a fridge for our Chicago condo, and went to Gourmandise for treats (I had another Groupon). The total for our treats was $17.77, and the cashier pointed out that this was a very patriotic total! Then we went to the park to play and eat our treats.

Mary's chocolate meringue is bigger than her head. She dropped it in the street at the end of the outing and was quite distressed. — Mary’s chocolate meringue is bigger than her head. She dropped it in the street at the end of the outing and was quite distressed.

Mary took her cookie everywhere with her--even down the slide. — Mary took her cookie everywhere with her–even down the slide.

She was so dizzy afterward. Her eyes kept going back and forth, and she fell down no less than three times. Abe and I about died laughing.

The house next to the park. This is the childhood home of Richard L. Evans, apostle and founder of Music and the Spoken Word. I loooooooove this house. Every time we play in the park, I peer over the hedges into the side windows--and the side of this house is even more charming than the front, but I haven't figured out how to photography it with the hedge in the way. — The house next to the park. This is the childhood home of Richard L. Evans, apostle and founder of Music and the Spoken Word. I loooooooove this house. Every time we play in the park, I peer over the hedges into the side windows–and the side of this house is even more charming than the front, but I haven’t figured out how to photography it with the hedge in the way.

Tomorrow I leave for yoga at 8:30, which means that bedtime should be…now.

Busy, busy

This morning, after I visit taught Marilyn, we went to play group at Red Butte Gardens.

racing to the three bears' house — racing to the three bears’ house

Lydia and Brooke pushed their sisters, Mary and Annie, all around on their strollers. Annie and Mary are just weeks apart. It was pretty cute.

Tinah posing. Doesn't she look like Fancy Nancy? — Tinah posing. Doesn’t she look like Fancy Nancy?

After naps, we spent the afternoon doing errands. I promised my friend, Rose, I would find her a sushi mat–but they were nowhere to be found! I ended up being late to my Primary meeting (I just got called Sunday as first counselor in the Primary) with no sushi mat for Rose. (There was a sushi class in the gym at the same time as my meeting.) It all worked out, though, because the teachers brought sushi mats for everyone. Where they got them, I have no idea. Maybe the bought out all the Salt Lake stores and that’s why I couldn’t find any mats. At any rate, I ended up with a free sushi mat, and the Primary presidency is very laid back. No one cared that I was late–phew!

Also, mom, aren’t you the first counselor in your Primary? I can’t believe I haven’t talked to you since Sunday. We’ll have to chat tomorrow.

Another also: Mary learned how to climb out of her crib today. It’s actually kind of nice, because instead of crying until I come get her, she just climbs out and entertains herself. On the other hand, trying to get her to bed was a nightmare…Lydia came out at one point crying, “Mom, I have an idea! I have an idea! Let’s put a door on top of Mary’s crib! And if she still climbs out, we can put lots of doors!!”

A third “also”: I have pictures from the weekend that I am just posting now:

Cadence and Lydia going to church together.

I am holding the door (and holding Mary like a sack of potatoes).

Here are the pictures Abe took while I was in my meeting:

catch-up!

Sorry to have been out of commission for so long! Friday was my birthday, and it was so fun-packed that I didn’t have any energy to blog by the end. The girls were so sweet to me all day. Lydia kept wishing me happy birthday and let me sleep in as a birthday present. I asked her if she could entertain herself so I could sleep longer on my birthday–selfish, I know, but she was so sweet! She went potty, brushed her teeth, and played quietly while I slept an extra hour. Mary also kept saying, “Happy! Happy!” to me all day long. That’s how she says “happy birthday.”

Lydia wanted to help Mary get dressed in the morning. Mary appreciated the help.

Mary spotted the cake upon awaking from her nap, and she refused to eat anything else.

Abe and I used a groupon to go to Cucina Toscana for dinner, and it was wonderful. Suzanne was an angel and baby-sat for us all evening. We were so grateful!

house made gnocchi in a stupendous tomato sauce, and a mind-blowing spinach lemon ravioli and a mornay sauce.

On Saturday, I got up at 5:30 so I could go to yoga. Then I came home and we all went to the pool for a swim.

We got to the pool and realized it wasn't free swim time. The lifeguard was so kind and let us put the kids in a swim lesson that was going on --for free! Mary and Lydia both learned to float, jump in, and kick! — We got to the pool and realized it wasn’t free swim time. The lifeguard was so kind and let us put the kids in a swim lesson that was going on –for free! Mary and Lydia both learned to float, jump in, and kick!

Then we met up with Karin and Jay for lunch at Gourmandise. I have been dreaming about their creme brulee oatmeal ever since I got it when I went to breakfast with Aria a while back. Daydreams were fulfilled.

Mary cuddled with Karin for such a long time. We finally had to take her and try to make her eat something, but she looked pretty content here.

Lydia picked out this cookie after lunch. That's a mouse cookie. It's a chocolate truffle coated with ganache on a lemony cookie base with a bit of raspberry flling. — Lydia picked out this cookie after lunch. That’s a mouse cookie. It’s a chocolate truffle coated with ganache on a lemony cookie base with a bit of raspberry flling.

Mary eating her mouse cookie. — Mary eating her half of the mouse cookie.

Then we went grocery shopping, took a nap, and got ready for our dinner.

Mary "drove the car" with Abe while I grocery shopped. — Mary “drove the car” with Abe while I grocery shopped.

I made a ton of food, but whenever we have guests I always think we’re going to run out of food. Whenever my parents threw parties growing up, we would eat leftovers for weeks; my dad never wanted to run out of food at a party. I think I inherited my fear of running out of food from him. Anyway, I made Jamaican jerk steak, kasha (threw it out because I did it wrong and replaced it with cous cous), carrot salad, roasted veggies, balsamic blackberry gingered strawberries, corn on the cob, and chimichurri sauce. Candace brought Harmon’s bread and Emily brought a marvelous fruit salad. Unfortunately, I was having so much fun with everyone that I forgot to take pictures. Abe did manage to take a picture of the cake with his phone (Gourmandise had a Groupon for cake!):

Gourmandise had a Groupon for a birthday cake. This was a chocolate truffle raspberry cake. It was to die for.

The girls played outside before our party.

We had to set up an extra table for the party since we had seven grown-ups and five kids. While Abe was taking down the table, he sliced off a good portion of the padding on his finger. He cut off the flap with a scissors, and it’s still bleeding (a full twenty-four hours later). He spent most of last night in excruciating pain. I was up until midnight talking with Candace, and I didn’t realize how much pain Abe was in until he called me up because he was struggling so much. I felt so sorry for him! Today it’s not as painful, although we’re going to douse it in hydrogen peroxide soon, and I’m sure that will be torture for him. Say a prayer for Abe.

We got to church half an hour late today because I was prepping for our post-church picnic.

After church we had a picnic today with Ben, Candace, Cadence, Bentley, Aria, Stephen, and Balu.

After our picnic, Candace and Ben drove back to Idaha. I hated to see them go and felt really lonely and sad with the house empty. I wish Candace lived closer.

I treated my sorrow with a nap, and when we woke up, the house still felt empty. We called Mike and Paige at that point and asked if they could come over to help us finish off the million pounds of leftover food in our fridge. They were wonderful and came. We spent hours discussing the disciplinary council of Kate Kelly and John Dehlin. It was really cathartic, and I felt like I learned a lot from the discussion.

Mary somehow got covered in marker while we were getting food out for dinner with the Andersons. Her face matched her dress.

Mike pointed out that Utah twilight lasts hours, and we enjoyed it all evening. It was a perfect night. This June has been so glorious.

I love June too.

I love June. It is my favorite month of the year. The weather right now makes me so, so happy. Sometimes I wonder if I have a touch of Seasonal Affective Disorder because when I read my childhood journals, half the time I think I might as well be reading a daily blow-by-blow of the weather report. At any rate, the good weather has been lifting my spirits all month long, and today we celebrated by going to Red Butte Gardens.

After we got home, we headed straight to the home of Abe’s friend, Andrew Walker. He and Abe have been trying to get together for over a year, and we finally got around to it tonight. It was so nice to visit with Andrew and his family, and Andrew told us amazing stories about his dad, who is a church historian. Apparently, before President Hinckley died, he wanted the whole story of the Mountain Meadow Massacre researched and told in its entirety.

Andrew’s dad was the first professor in the history of BYU to get a two year leave to write the book, and he researched every single fact surrounding the massacre. He studied all of the original documents out there and unearthed secret journals in the process. Every single sentence that he wrote is meticulously documented in the footnotes of his book, which comprise two-thirds of the final work. I can’t wait to read the book, and hearing his account of what actually happened cleared up a lot of questions for me.

Here are the pictures I took today (mostly from the gardens):

"Hi Fishies!" Mary was especially enthused by her encounter with the fish. She kept begging to go back. I was afraid the girls would slip and fall in. Next time they're not going to wear their jellies! — “Hi Fishies!” Mary was especially enthused by her encounter with the fish. She kept begging to go back. I was afraid the girls would slip and fall in. Next time they’re not going to wear their jellies!

Lydia needed frequent breaks from all the work of pushing the stroller.

The Three Bears' Cottage. — The Three Bears’ Cottage.

We pretended to have tea inside the cottage of the three bears.

Quick Post

Today was a good day for everyone at the Darais house. We haven’t been sleeping much, but in spite of that, God has given us strength to not only manage, but find great joy.

Lily got a TON of house work done, including accomplishing hours worth of laundrey washing, drying, folding, sorting and putting-away. For a brief moment in the Darais home there was literally NOTHING that needed to be washed…….I know I wont sleep in the socks I’m currently wearing, so unfortunately the pile starts again tonight……

Lily read to the girls separately, read in her book about the Monart method of teaching your children to draw and she read in a book about how to teach your children to read. She said she felt very happy and close to God today. What a wonderful and productive day!

I had a good day at work. I was a little tired, but I kept my nose to the grind-stone. Days usually come for two packages for me, successful days and learning days. Today was more of a learning day, but I did learn and I believe success will come. At home I had the most wonderful time with the girls. They were both in super good moods and we all danced to K-Love together. We went totally wild when our favorite song “Every Act of Love” by Jason Grey came on. I was dancing while holding Mary and she screamed to indicate that she wanted to be set down…..when I set her down she proceeded to get her groove on and I thought it was hilarious! Days like this I am reminded why I’m so grateful to not have a job that takes my attention at home as well as at work. I was completely engaged with the children and drinking from the cup of pure joy.

Pictures!

Blabbing about home schooling

This morning I raced around the house doing and folding loads upon loads of laundry, cleaning up and putting away Easter/Spring decorations, painting Lydia’s nails, feeding the girls, and reading to the girls. When Mary went down for her nap, I read to Lydia, practiced piano, and read more of The Well-Trained Mind. I have an action plan, I think.

Next year I’ll send Lydia to Challenger as planned. I am still going to be in school, and even though I’m going to buy some supplementary material and start coaching her from home, I feel a little too stretched to make a disciplined home-school commitment. The year after, though, I am going to experiment with home-school. I’ll start Lydia on a reading and math schedule and see if I can be disciplined enough to hack that kind of schedule at home.

All that to say, the book, The Well-Trained Mind: A Guide for Classical Education has completely changed my paradigm. I used to think homeschooling was strange and produced social misfits. However, two things: 1) I was not home schooled and yet still managed to come out a social misfit with massive social anxiety 2) Jessie Wise, the author, poses this question: Socialization to what purpose? To fit in? To dumb down? To navigate an entirely artificial environment where all your peers are the same age–an environment not replicated in real life ever again? She argues that the family should be the primary unit of socialization because the end goal is for the child to become a high-functioning adult that understands what it takes to create a peaceful home and to contribute to society.

Before, every time the thought of homeschooling crossed my mind, I immediately dismissed the thought because I was so scared my children would end up strange and neurotic. But hey, my favorite people are people who are themselves and don’t try too hard to fit in. What’s wrong with raising children like that? The more I think about it, the more sense it seems to make.

At the end of the day, I still don’t know if I’ll home school, but I know I love this book’s educational philosophy, and my connotation for the term “home school” is permanently changed.

There’s Abe. He finished working out. He barely slept last night, so I better stop blabbing on the blog and go to bed.

Here’s a picture of the girls playing with the laundry basket while I folded piles of laundry. Lydia thought it was hilarious to put the basket over Mary, and Mary thought it was hilarious too…until she stopped thinking it was hilarious, and then she cried. Then I put Lydia in her room because she wouldn’t stop the game, and Lydia cried too. That was the only crying of the day, though!! (Oops. Except when I left for school and Mary saw her babysitter–she cried a lot then, too.) Anyway, I can’t seem to stop typing! The picture already:

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