email correspondence – Page 6

preschool and Monday morning parenting

I dropped Lydia off at preschool this morning and then did a ton of errands with Mary. I lost my phone a week ago, so I have no way of taking pictures on the go (unless I want to risk taking my big camera and losing it too!). If I could have taken a picture, though, I would have taken one of Mary in Sprouts. The cashier gave her a balloon, and her wide-eyed fixation on it was so cute; her eyes got even bigger when she let go of the balloon and watched it float up to the ceiling. Another cashier felt sorry for her and tied a new balloon to her wrist, and she looked at nothing else until I wriggled it off of her an hour later.

Then at lunch I got curious and asked Lydia what her favorite things in the whole world are. These are her responses, in order: 1) coloring, 2) playing with her cat, 3) cooking with me, 4) playing with the letters on the fridge. Her responses were really quick, so I think that means they must be sincere. I hope they are, at least, since #3 warmed my heart.

I spent the rest of the day slightly irritable–just like yesterday! I was feeling pretty low when Anique called and asked if she could drop off some soup and tortellini. Seeing her made me happy, as did eating her food. But then I started feeling bad again because I had the HARDEST time being patient with Lydia. She ate six meals today, and between meals 3 and 4 she snacked continually. The constant catering and cleaning made me crazy, but I feel like I should feed her when she says she’s hungry because Abe eats all day long, and I figure maybe she inherited a need for continual nourishment from him.

Class tonight was great, though. I learned why food turns brown and about the effect of acid and alkili on different groups of vegetables. We also did a bunch of food safety videos because after this class, we get some sort of food handling permit (if we pass the test).

While I was gone, the girls opened a letter from my mom. She sent Lydia cat stickers and Mary a butterfly card. Apparently, the girls loved their gifts from Nana and spent a lot of time playing with them. (Lydia put cat stickers all over her coloring book, and Mary walked around with her butterfly card.)

Then I came home and saw this:

Lydia crafted this bird at preschool. She kept trying to show Abe her bird all evening, but he was on the phone with my mom and didn't pay attention until after Lydia was already in bed. He hung it up because he felt bad and also because it was a great craft. I do all my best parenting after my kids are asleep, too. When they're asleep, I always think of EVERYTHING I wish I had done better when they were awake. Oh, well. Guess I get to try again tomorrow. — Lydia crafted this bird at preschool. She kept trying to show Abe her bird all evening, but he was on the phone with my mom and didn’t pay attention until after Lydia was already in bed. He hung it up because he felt bad and also because it was a great craft. I do all my best parenting after my kids are asleep, too. When they’re asleep, I always think of EVERYTHING I wish I had done better when they were awake. Oh, well. Guess I get to try again tomorrow.

ramblings

This morning I fed the girls, practiced, and took them to Institute and the library. At Institute, both girls went to nursery. They did fine until Lydia had a little run-in with a friend, and Lydia burst into tears. At the sight of Lydia in tears, Mary became inconsolable, and I could hear her soundtrack an entire floor down. But I got to attend most of Institute before that, and it was awesome. The curator of the BYU museum of art talked to us about the Carl Bloch exhibit, and I am now dying to go.

Our institute is packed, and so parking is hard. I thought I’d found a great spot today, but when I came out, I discovered a ticket! Did you know you can’t park within 20 inches of a crosswalk? I sure didn’t. I wasn’t blocking the crosswalk, but I guess that wasn’t good enough. I guess I know now.

By the time we came home, the girls had gotten a second wind, so I played with them for another hour before putting them down. Then I did my usual climb-into-bed deal for a nap and some reading. I started Good Lord Bird, and even though it is rather humorous, I already know I’m not going to finish it. Besides, it’s due tomorrow.

When the girls woke up, we ate, cooked, colored, played, read, and I sneaked in more practice (while they ate). Then Abe came home and we had a lightning fast FHE.

Since yesterday was the State of the Union, I decided to do a lesson on our president. I remember when I was a little girl, one of my greatest friends and teachers was my next door neighbor, Ruth. She was in her 90’s, and she was a wonderful listener. She also had a way of gently correcting that never felt like a reprimand but still had great sticking power. On one occasion, I remember going over and saying some negative things about Clinton to her. Ruth responded by telling me that she was from a part of Indiana where the people are called “yellow dog Democrats,” meaning if a yellow dog was on the Democratic ticket, they would vote for it. She said that once she remembered saying something bad about the Republican president, and her mother immediately replied that the presidential office is worthy of our respect and support, no matter who holds it.

I haven’t always acted on the principle Ruth taught me that day, but it’s always in the back of my mind during political conversations. Abe and I read the twelfth Article of Faith to the girls (“We believe in being ^asubject to ^bkings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in ^cobeying, honoring, and sustaining the ^dlaw“) in the hopes that they learn to respect our leaders and honoring all efforts to uphold our democratic system. In order to drive the message home, we played parachute. By now, Abe and I joke that we can relate parachute to any gospel principle; this time it was, “We should uphold our leaders just like we will uphold these objects…in the air over the blanket!”

Then I ran off to Bikram with Anique. Thank goodness she drove, because I felt so sick afterward, I don’t know how I would have made it home. The room was packed, and so maybe the extra bodies drove the temperature up. Whatever it was, I did not feel good afterward and am only now starting to feel somewhat normal.

Here are the pictures from the day:

Ever since Santa brought Lydia her cat back, Puss has played and ever more central role in Lydia's life. She has full-blown conversations with him all day long, and he is her favorite thing to discuss with other people. Mary has picked onto this, and when Lydia is feeling sad, Mary has started bringing her her cat. This was after a sad event with a tower Lydia was building, and Mary was cheering her up. — Ever since Santa brought Lydia her cat back, Puss has played and ever more central role in Lydia’s life. She has full-blown conversations with him all day long, and he is her favorite thing to discuss with other people. Mary has picked up on this, and when Lydia is feeling sad, Mary has started bringing her her cat. This was after a sad event with a tower Lydia was building, and Mary was cheering her up.

I snapped this picture and then joined in. That left corner of the blanket needed some help!

Undone by being binky-free

Today started out strong, really. I deep cleaned the kitchen, did laundry, played with my kids, read to my kids, worked on reading with Lydia…and then came nap time. Mary is learning to sleep without her binky, so today nap time was severely truncated.

In its absence, I developed a pounding headache and by the end of the day I was in bed watching this (can you believe that the audience hissed at the premier?! This concerto–in its original 2 piano version– has been the equivalent of my musical comfort food since elementary school. I just can’t imagine a sound aesthetic where this seemed musically deviant!) while Abe tried to entertain the kids on speaker phone during his commute.

I had great plans to get all of my homework done today, but that will have to wait.

Here are today’s pictures:

Grandma, Mary played with those bugaboos you gave her all day. We literally played with them for an hour straight, and that was after she spent the whole morning wearing them around her neck. — Grandma, Mary played with those bugaboos you gave her a ton today. We literally played with them for an hour straight (all I did for 60 minutes was take them apart and put them back together again and again), and that was *after* she spent the whole morning wearing them around her neck.

The rest of the pictures are from FHE tonight, wherein Abe put on another puppet show about sharing. Per my request, he also threw in a skit about staying in your seat until you’re done eating. Grandma, do you recognize some of those puppets?

Abe got great feedback at work today and great feedback on the sermon he wrote for Jon and Shirley. It’s truly beautiful. If they allow me, I’ll post it after their wedding in May.

To bed, to bed.

Wherein Lily learns to distrust a cookbook

We were an hour late to church because Mary slept in a looooong time. I guess all that running around the church gym last night tired her out! It worked out, though, because we got to Skype with Sruthi (Swathi’s sister who lives in Calcutta). It was great to chat with her, and by the time we were done, Mary was just waking up.

I learned today in Sunday School that today marks the one hundred year anniversary of the extinction of the passenger pigeon. I remember a scene from The Pioneers by James Fenimore Cooper wherein one pioneer shoots a canon into a cloud of pigeons…for fun. And now, here we are one hundred years after the passing of the last of those birds. Some stewards of this glorious creation we’ve been.

On that note, we all took deliciously long naps this afternoon. At the end of it, both girls and Abe gave me a back massage. During my massage, I could not imagine heaven being one bit better. Maybe it is? But that was hard to beat.

And then my day came crashing down around this: brown butter icing. Joy of Cooking promises that this is a quick and easy recipe, and it also says not to make this too far in advance. I thought, terrific! A carrot cake with apricot preserves and brown butter icing flecked with orange zest. It sounded so yummy and pretty. And then, this happened:

You can’t see it, but there are grease pools on top of that cake. I was all in a frenzy because we were late and the cake looked like this, and Abe kept telling me it looked fine and we should just take it to the Miners’ as is.

It looked fine?

At that point, my response helped Abe decide to exit the kitchen. I made up some butter cream and smeared it all over this mess, and at that point I got really mad at Joy of Cooking because, thanks to their instructions, the hot brown butter icing melted the buttercream. But there was nothing left to do, so we took the unsightly blob to the Miners, stuck candles in it, sang to Abe, and cut it up. The cake itself tasted great, but the icing tasted only nominally better than it looked. Next time I will be sticking to cream cheese icing and consulting America’s Test Kitchen instead of that sub-par Rombauer publication.

Here are the pictures from the Miners’:

And one from earlier this morning at church:

Mary is growing up! We took away her binky tonight. It is sad and painful, and Lydia claims to remember how hard this was when we did this to her. She told Mary that it would be okay, but Mary doesn’t seem to agree at present.

Fun company

The one solitary picture I took occurred during our morning play date with Misty, Sophia, and Max. We went to the Discovery Gateway Children’s Museum together, and this is what Lydia and Sophia did while we checked in:

Then we came home, ate lunch, and had naps/quiet time. I’ve been feeling sick and I knew I had five hours of class tonight, so instead of hightailing it to the piano, I crawled into bed with Beethoven’s latest biography. I have loved learning more about him, but this one thing stuck out to me: One of his guests described his apartment, and in doing so noted that there was, I kid you not, an unemptied chamber pot underneath the piano. All the chairs had food and clothes strewn all over them, and there was a mountain of dust on the piano. The author noted that Beethoven literally lived in squalor. Can you imagine? He composed his magnificent work in that!!! I should really ease up about the kitchen floor.

A lot of other tender, funny, and truly sad moments touched me today, but since it’s almost midnight, we’ll have to leave on the note of Beethoven’s unemptied chamber pot.

But I also had my first lab class tonight, and I L.O.V.E.D. it. My teacher is a former middle school English teacher who gave that up to go to cooking school and ended up at Chez Panisse. She is very funny, knowledgeable and has endearing mannerisms. We worked on dicing, stocks, and kitchen etiquette/clean-up today. I have great classmates who all seem to be team players, and it was just fun. I was worried that the late hour of the class (6 – 11 pm) would be hard, but the material was so riveting I had no problem paying attention.

Okay, one last anecdote about Alice Waters, since my teacher worked for her. She told us that when Alice Waters came to town, everyone at the restaurant would have to change routines. In Alice’s absence, they would use the fireplace as a cooling station and set up the kitchen for efficiency. When Alice Waters visited, they’d be warned in advance and set up the kitchen for her arrival by lighting a fire in the fireplace and setting out vases of fresh herbs all around the kitchen. I guess even Alice Waters can be out of touch sometimes. (She did note that the restaurant had an incredible vibe and notably egalitarian spirit; the chef world is normally very hierarchical, but nothing of that sort is tolerated in Alice’s Berkely kitchen.)

Anyway, I spent the day with my children, Misty, Sophia, Max, Beethoven and Alice Waters (and Job and Nephi). Not bad for a Thursday.

Spur play date and outing reality check

We’ve all been getting sick for a while now, but I was in denial all morning because I wanted Lydia to be able to go to preschool. Our co-op has a rule that runny noses aren’t allowed, and you would think that’s pretty easy to understand except that I get hung up on the definition of “runny.” Finally, I admitted to myself that she really did have a runny nose, and we stayed home. Bummer.

Until! Until the phone rang. Aria called and suggested a play date, which was perfect since her kids both had slightly runny noses too. Great! We proceeded to have an awesome play date which culminated/ended in lunch and hot chocolate. By the time we were done, Mary was waaaaay overdue for her nap (usually at 11 am, today pushed to 1:30 pm).

After naps, I loaded the girls in the car. They have not set foot outside of the house since Sunday; we were overdue for an outing. But man, oh, man, by the time we were done with our library-grocery store run, I was just about ready for self-induced house arrest for the rest of winter. Waiting in line with two screaming children in an understaffed Sprouts was…horrible. To be fair, Lydia was great 90% of the time, but all it takes is a five minute meltdown for the whole outing to feel like a total disaster. By the time I got both girls back into the car, I was ready for a meltdown myself. Also, Mary lost her binky half way through our outing and screamed for the rest of the time. I spent about five minutes searching up and down the aisles for it before giving up and heading toward the mile long check-out lines.

To make it slightly worse, the woman behind me kept making exasperated sounds while I fumbled to get my groceries loaded onto the checkout stand. I was holding one screaming baby in one hand while the other cried and hung onto my legs, and I was mentally already throwing the b-word around when I realized that the poor woman looked like she was about to have a heart attack. She was bent over in pain and looked ashy gray in the face. I should have made sure she was okay, but she didn’t seem to enjoy the time my situation had already cost her, so I figured I’d better skip the small talk. Instead, I tried to internalized the lesson: Don’t judge on appearances. A woman who might appear to be an unfeeling, heartless b– is much more likely to be a wonderful person who might be acting out of her own personal duress. I hope I have more understanding and patience the next time I run into someone like that.

Anyway, here are today’s pictures:

I set up the princess castle tent for the play date. Espen really wanted Enna to come in with him.

He wanted to give her a hug. Precious overload.

Lydia put this hat on Espen. His great grandparents were the first LDS converts from South Africa after the missionaries were sent in the second time, so this was actually a pretty appropriate attire. Also, the girls and I spent part of the morning playing “Imagination” on that pink blanket. I’d forgotten how fun that game is! Also, Lydia handed me a pretend sea shell during dinner, thanks to our morning game.

At the library. Lydia was up to her old hoarding tricks again.

I made stuffed pumpkins again, and I kind of love taking pictures of them. They're just...cute. — I made stuffed pumpkins again, and I kind of love taking pictures of them. They’re just…cute.

Food and family

This morning we had a relief society lesson on the nature of God. Our teacher referenced The God Who Weeps in class, a book I started but didn’t finish last year. It was a wonderful, beautiful book, and maybe I’ll get around to finishing it this year! I, um, hope.

In Sunday School, we talked about our premortal existence. Somehow, the lesson got translated into this: Life is painful, but hang on and have faith! …A far cry from the outline in the manual, I’m sure. Also, lessons where the teacher and class sink into how hard life is always make me feel slightly uncomfortable. I mean, I know I complain a lot, but at no point in time am I so deluded by self pity that I actually think my life is hard hard. Sometimes I wish it were harder so I could exercise more faith and endure, but seeing as it’s not, I am most interested in keeping the flames of faith burning and keeping apathy at bay. Lessons where members of my beloved little class all seem to agree that life is about Endurance make me feel like I should suffer more.

Then I came home, ate, napped, and cooked dinner. Tom and Suzanne came over tonight, and that was so fun. I made the usual: stuffed squash rings, steamed broccoli, cheese souffle, rolls, and baked pears. It all got eaten before we could take a picture.

But here are the pictures we did take!

When she’s not picking her nose, Lydia is picking her lip. Sigh.

Abe got a blessing from his dad today for his new job, and I got a blessing for the new semester. I feel really good and peaceful right now, and I guess at the end of the day, I’m really glad there’s a void of serious suffering in my life (at least right now).

9 to 9 run-down.

Abe went to Tom and Suzanne’s house this morning to work on his work stuff, and in the meantime I: Started making tomorrow’s dinner, played piano with the girls, aided Lydia in her attempts to craft more postcards for her cat, read books to Lydia, and rocked Mary for approximately half an hour while both girls threw long, loud tantrums. Finally, I figured out Mary needed breakfast #2, and after that she went to sleep.

Then Lydia and I Skyped with Clark and Swathi until Abe came home. As soon as he came home, I hightailed it to the piano and remained there until Mary woke up from her nap. I think after that we ate again, read more books, and then I took a nap.

After that, we went to the library to pick out more books and read down some more fines. Then we stopped at Payless to buy my chef shoes (this semester is my first one with a lab class, so I didn’t need them until now). It seems like a lot of food industry people must shop at Payless because they had a TON of non-slip, food-industry friendly options all in the same place.

Then it was gas, groceries, home, dinner, clean the kitchen, read to the girls, and bedtime.

I should mention that Lydia, who had been anticipating our outing all day long, fell asleep the minute we got into the car and didn’t wake up until we returned home hours later. Even after we brought her inside, she sat on the couch in an unblinking stupor for (Abe and I timed it, sort of) 20 minutes.

We thought it was funny.

Since I finished The Hobbit, I feel like maybe I can read again. But even though I checked out three fabulous options (Gladwell’s David and Goliath, a Beethoven biography, and The Fellowship of the Ring), I feel pulled to this month’s issue of Martha Stewart Living. The iPad edition has links to six different heirloom seed catalogs for vegetables alone. There are also links to flowers and other plants, but it’s the veggie links that truly pull on my heartstrings. Does this link not make you want to plant tomatoes, or does it not make you want to plant tomatoes? Tomorrow I am going to ask the bishop if I can get a plot in the church field a couple blocks from our house. Hopefully they’re not already all taken!

I should also mention that Tom did a magnificent job fixing Abe’s laptop today, and Abe has been over the moon with excitement and anticipation all day. My nightly blogging habit on his desk computer has made him miss a working laptop, and now he has one again. Hooray!

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