Darais Days

Here is a video of Ammon’s roar!

Clark, Swathi, Soren, and Meera left at 4am this morning and Ammon wandered into our room frowning.

“Where’s Soren?” he asked.

“Soren had to go to his home, Ammon. He’s in Seattle.”

“Oh, no!! That wasn’t supposed to be for more days,” he pouted.

I had the sad job of informing him he miscalculated the calendaring, and then assured him that we would see his cousins again soon (hopefully!!!).

Then Abe and I daydreamed about things we want to do after the pandemic. It’s so sad because right now Abe can work from anywhere in the world…but for obvious reasons, we are home bound. After daydreaming a lot, I spent a lot of time googling Airstream remodels.

We also cleaned the house. Abe went to help his aunt with some phone issues and did the grocery shopping while he was out. He also played basketball with the kids in the evening. It was sweet looking out the window at all these people I love having fun outside together. I also read more in my book, How to Do Nothing: Resisting the Attention Economy. I got really excited when I checked the back cover and discovered the author is half Filipino like me! I can count on one hand the half white-half-Filipinos I have met in my lifetime, and I always feel resonance. I don’t know if it’s my bias, but I am loving the book.

Also Abe got a cute picture of Ammon playing in the basement. He was building a maze.

In the evening we all drove to Heber and hiked the Cottontail loop trail. It was much, much more accessible than last week’s Silver Lake climb. Both Abe and I independently thought it reminded us of an Audoban trail we visited in New Mexico. I think it reminded us of that one because it was so peaceful and there was no one around.

Here is a video of the kids jumping.

Mary is our most prolific artist in the family. She churned out the below pictures while in Bear lake. Since we said goodby to Bear Lake today, I’ll start with her picture of the Bear Lake beach.

Aside from reading 3 or so books on the trip (Lemony Snicket Books), Lydia also got involved with artwork. She did a fun game where she folds up a piece of paper, and then each person draws a piece of a monster without seeing what any of the other pieces look like. It was a lot of fun!

The kids watched TV while we packed up and got everything ready to go. Also, while we packed, Clarissa pretended to be an owl, and other kids played along. Here is a video.

Once we were all packed, we drove home, enjoying music from Mariah Carey, Alicia Keys and other artists. We also listened to a “How to Train Your Dragon” book, which is by far my favorite children’s audio series.

Back at home the kids were adorably playing dress-up

We were so glad Swathi and Clark decided to come back to our place for two extra nights when their son Soren asked them to. It was so nice to spend more time together!

For dinner, Swathi made amazing grain bowls for everyone. They were sooooo gooood!!!

I may have mentioned this before, but a couple of days ago when I was standing in line for dinner, God lined things up so that I chatted with the people behind me in line and learned about American Fossil (because they like to go there), which is just past Fossil Butte Monument. Before talking with them, I was researching things to do, and I literally had Fossil Butte National Monument pulled up on my phone when I started talking with them.

That story means a lot to me because for multiple people in the group, fossil digging was a highlight for our trip. Personally, it was my favorite part. We woke up early, and were out the door before 7AM. We arrived at American Fossil at about 8:30. On the way, we saw a bunch of cows, including young cows that were so cute:

Once we arrived, they taught us about the fossils (they are 53 million years old), and they told us about the types of things we would find (fish, turtles, stingrays, poop etc). They also gave us instruction about how to hit the chisel and split rocks into thin layers.

Once we were all set and received our instructions, we got cracking! Here is some video footage:

Group

Lydia

Clark and Soren blew us all away with a whole fish they found in one of their rocks. Here is Swathi holding it after it was cut down as well as a close-up.

Here is a really great one that Lydia found. I was so happy she kept going even after she was frustrated at not finding much. This was a great find!

Also, Swathi found a whole fish, and Lydia got a very good looking fish as well. When we were all done cracking rocks (for about an hour), we loaded up the fossils we wanted to keep into a cart and then our guide cut them into smaller pieces for us.

The group loved fossil hunting. It was such an awesome experience, and it was made even more amazing by our subsequent visit to Fossil Butte National Monument. That amazing site had a timeline of the world that started way out on the road as you headed into the National Monument. Then, once you arrived, there was a walking path that covered the most recent 500 million years or so (the signs on the road were in the billions). The signs talked about the different living things, geological and meteorological facts, and extinction events etc. It was amazing to comprehend how much happened on our planet before humans even arrived.

I believe Fossil Butte is located at the same ancient dried up lake that we were digging at, so the fossils seen below are (I believe) at the same time period as our fossils (about 53 million years ago).

I loved the below display and it seems like the kids did to. I just loved envisioning what the world was like 53 million years ago before the lake dried up.

Outside Clarissa was so cute looking out of the binoculars and so I got a ton of pictures and this video.

Here are some more pictures that I got from the visitors center. The first one is a cross section of the type of limestone that we split looking for fossils.

The kids played hide and seek outside and it was adorable so I took a couple of videos.

Video of kids playing hide and seek

Vdeo of Clarissa counting.

After that, Lily, Lydia, Clarissa, Ammon and I went to the beach while the others stayed in at the Bear Lake House.

It was a wonderful day!

Last night I went to bed around 11:20 because I was too tired to stay up and puzzle with Lily and Clark. They stayed up puzzling, bonding, and talking. Not sure when Lily came to bed, but I’m guessing it was around 12:30, and she had a lot to tell me. She felt so affirmed talking to Clark because he both shared and understood her angry feelings towards the church. It was especially nourishing for her to share that dialogue with her brother because in Orem, Utah, she is surrounded by so many people that can’t understand the decisions she has made. But Clark understood completely. The Church fractured their family growing up and he has spent a lifetime observing Mormons from a distance. He has observed that every family has been fractured by the Church and he feels that the message of family friendliness is actually a cover for the way Mormonism shatters relationships. He asked Lily how she handles allowing the cycle to continue with our kids, and it prompted Lily to rethink how we are raising our kids, which prompted us to discuss it later in the day. We landed on the same basic approach of raising the kids halfway in the LDS church and halfway in the Community of Christ church, with the potential to end up entirely in the Community of Christ church, mostly due to the desire to gift our children with spirituality, a thirst for God and religious practices and understanding, reinforcement of values we want them to learn, identity, connection to their past, family, friends and neighbors, and with as minimal amount of toxicity and dysfunction as possible. Even though our approach remains the same, I had a refresher course on some of the pitfalls and perils we are due for if we are not careful, and I’m so grateful for a wife that will chisel out a nuanced path with me that can satisfy both of our visions and desires for our children. I’m also so glad she could have that nourishing talk with Her wonderful brother. They also got on the topic of end of the world scenarios (environmental decay, genocide etc) and Lily was also scared out of her mind about what life will be like for our children and grandchildren. I tried to say peaceful calming things. I always love talking with Lily.

Then at around 3 in the morning Clarissa woke up crying for a glass of water, so I got that. Then around 6:20 in the morning, Lydia had a massive nose bleed and Lily and I both got up to take care of that. There was so much blood on the comforter, you would have thought she lost an arm. Amazingly, I got most of the blood out of the duvet cover, and the duvet, the bedpost, the couch cushion cover (that for some reason was in the bedroom, and the carpet (when Lydia swallowed blood, she gagged and coughed up two big blood globs on the carpet). I got very short with her after the blood globs, because I was exhausted from two night wakings, and I thought I was done cleaning blood, and I had gotten back into bed and then she yelled for me to tell me about the carpet. After I got the carpet clean, I was in a better mood and was nice to her again. Sweet girl just had a doosey of a nose bleed.

The silver lining was that I was up early (I did not get back to sleep), so I just blogged and caught up completely.

After blogging, I had breakfast and hung around with everyone, and helped to serve lunch and clean. I also scheduled our fossil adventures for tomorrow. I’m am jumping out of my skin with excitement for tomorrow’s fossil adventures.

Georgia and the girls had fun flying some toy airplanes she got for them. Here are some videos of them flying the planes:

Georgia

Mary

Lydia

Also, Ammon was showing me new Haka dances and Soren showed me his silly dance.

Around 2:00, we all took off for the beach. Here is Georgia waving us off:

The beach was such a blast again! Before getting into the water, I took Mary to the restroom (she has had about a week with no accidents and we think the Miralax helped clear out and restart her system). On the way back, I say this neat purple flower cactus thing (whatever it is).

Then I took to the water with the kids. To mix things up from yesterday, I bought a little adventure boat (in addition to two more inflatable stars since those were so popular) that the kids can ride around in. It said it could hold up to 120 pounds. I figured that was a loose guideline, and tried to ride it with Mary, but I got out after taking water into the raft. After that failed attempt, we stuck with children only riding in the raft, and they had such a wonderful time with it. First I took Mary and Ammon towing them on a long ride. Then I took Lydia and Clarissa (with Mary hanging on and floating on her star), and then Ammon joined in so I was pulling all four. My heart felt so full pulling all of my children on the beautiful lake. Then, to my delight, Lily came and joined us, and we had a wonderful family moment. I took off a piece of oar to make it more kid-sized, and I used it like a sword to fight hephalumps, taking a page from the Christopher Robin movie we saw yesterday. I also let Ammon squirt me with his squirter and he thought that was so hilarious when I yelled (comically) from it being cold.

I did get some good smiles with my hephalump fighting, but Clark was the real crowd-pleaser. He took Ammon and Soren on a boat ride. He told them that they were going to cross the entire lake, and then he added in extra adventure by giving them rough water. I was delighted to catch it on camera. What a fun uncle for Ammon and father for Soren!

Crossing the lake

Rough Water

Then I went to the beach to see this happy scene of Lydia, Meera and Swathi enjoying the beach and water.

And I was not at all surprised to then find Clarissa playing in her favorite element, water of course. Here is the video.

A great time was definitely had by all. After the adults had their fill (the kids could have stayed forever), we picked up food and drove home.

At the house, Lily and Lydia finished the national parks puzzle. Lily said it was one of her favorite puzzles she has ever done. Thank you Suzanne!

After we all ate dinner we started the festivities for Clark’s birthday.

We lit candles on little cupcakes. Here is a video of the cake blow.

Then Clark started opening presents. He got books from me and Lily (picked out by Lily) and also money from Georgia for more children’s books.

He got airpods from Swathi. Swathi knew what to get him because he is always borrowing hers. I thought it was funny when Clark says he always feels guilty for borrowing Swathi’s airpods, but the guilt never stops him from borrowing them. He loves airpods!

Then we all put the kids down and went to bed early because we have an early start tomorrow for fossil digging.

I just have to sign off with a happy birthday message for Clark. He is an incredible blend of intelligence, quiet strength and kind-heartedness. He is a deep thinker, and is well-informed. I find him to always be someone worth listening to. He is fun, good natured, and warm. It was a blast to throw the football with him today! Perhaps my favorite thing about Clark is his heart. He does an incredible job informing himself about the world and living out values that make the world a better place. He’s an amazing family man, business man, brother to my wife, son to my mother-in-law and friend to me. He’s pleasant, strong, humble, insightful, fun, and steady. Always a joy to have around. He has certainly found his match with our brilliant and loving Swathi, who I also can’t say enough good about. Clark, may your 35 year be your best yet! Also, here is a birthday card Mary made for Clark that I captured:

Today was Georgia’s 75th Birthday! Most of the festivities were in the evening, so more on that later in the blog!

The day started with a trip to North Beach, the most famous beach of Bear Lake because of its abundant pleasant sand, I am sure.

We had a lot of fun building sandspas footbaths. Mine had a throne on it.

Then we had a lot of fun burying Ammon!

We also buried Clarissa who was slightly less cooperative, so she only got buried half way.

The inflatable stars we bought at a nearby shop were a hit! Almost everyone spent a lot of time floating with a companion on a star. Poor Lydia got a burn on her upper legs near her butt. We must have missed that spot with sunscreen. This lake was so fun because it is only 1.5 feet deep out for 100 feet or so from the shore. It was like a giant wading pool and we all had so much fun!

Lydia, Soren, and Ammon were making a rock collection when it was time to go. Lydia insisted I get a picture.

After the beach, I went on a run from our house into town and back. It was crazy intense because of the two-mile uphill on the way back! After the two mile push, I walked the last 3/4 mile to try to cool down.

After my run, we all took family photos, which is what Georgia always loves on her birthday. We finally got everyone looking on the last one!

Then we had a spaghetti and leftover dinner that was delicious!

After dinner, we started the Christopher Robin movie and then we had a delicious assorted cake that had four sections, German chocolate, red velvet, carrot and chocolate. Here is a video of the cake blow.

Then Georgia got some beautiful water bottles from me and Lily (which Lily picked out) and a card from Mary.

After that, the adults and older kids finished watching Christopher Robin while the babies were in bed. Christopher Robin is a new animated/live action Winnie the Pooh movie about Christopher Robin growing up and losing his inner child, but finding it again through the help of Winnie the Pooh and his other friends from hundred acre wood. The scenery was mind-blowing. Also, I was so touched and entertained by the movie, and I loved the message of making time for fun with the people we love most…having time for nothing which leads to the best something. I also loved the mindfulness message at the end when Pooh says, “Today is the best day. Yesterday, when today was tomorrow, that was too much day for me to handle.” It was a lot like Mary Poppins in terms of its message and plot. I absolutely loved the movie.

I also absolutely love Georgia. She is going through very intense things with her health right now and it is amazing to watch her courageously try to walk the line of knowing when to fight and when to surrender. She is caring, loving, courageous, kind, and I have never met someone who so willingly serves all those around her. It was so fun to chat and watch a movie with her today and celebrate this incredible milestone with her. Happy 75th Georgia!!!

I have recently gotten into Road Biking. This started from my friendship with Daniel Olsen, Mary’s piano teacher. He has been taking me on bike-rides and lending me his old bike. I’ve been in the market for my own road bike and when we sold the condo, we had the funds for it. Lily has been very supportive, and also she has been scared stiff that I will die biking (we know multiple people who have had close family die from road-biking), so I have committed to not bike the Alpine Loop (which has a tiny shoulder) and to research safety practices, and to get good safety gear. Accidents are a real and sometimes fatal thing for bikers and I want to be as safe as possible.

My friend Austin (from Qualtrics enablement) offered to keep an eye out for a bike for me since he researches local classifieds for bikes just as a hobby. He found me a beautiful bike, and would you even believe that the seller was located at Bear Lake? He’s had a couple calls about it, but it seems his distance has discouraged people.

Well, today I went to see him. His name was Gary, and he was the nicest man. We both wore our masks. I recently decided that the definition of a leader is someone who changes culture, and you can’t change culture if you are beholden to culture, so if I want to be a leader, I just need to wear my mask at all times and stop worrying what other people think about me, for example here at Bear Lake where it seems nobody is wearing a mask.

He told me all about his beautiful bike. You could tell he was very attached to it, but at his current home, there are gravel roads, so he needs to buy a gravel bike. He was very cheerful and it was a delight to talk with him. Paying him was very complicated. He didn’t have Venmo, and I tried to pull out the $950 from an ATM, but the limit was $300, and when I went to the second ATM, Chase Bank thought I was a fraud that had stolen the card, so I couldn’t pull more money out (I would have needed a third or a fourth ATM because the second ATM had a cap of $200) and Chase had over a 20 minute wait to talk to an agent, and my call dropped while on hold. We eventually figured out he had Paypal, and I jumped on his wifi to download the app and pay him that way.

I brought home lunch for everyone from a series of food trucks:

Then we all went to Garden City Beach. We are staying just outside of Garden City. The beach was super rocky and muddy, and the rocks were hard on my feet. But we still had fun experiencing the lake and getting wet. The highlight for me was sitting in the water for 45 minutes with Clarissa while she threw rocks (even big rocks) in the water as she babbled sweet sounds to herself completely lost in her own imaginative happy world.

I had a ton of fun chatting with Clark, Swathi and Lily at night while they puzzled. I heard all about Clark’s neighbor who is so handy. His name is Eddie. To give you an example of how handy he is, when a car repair was going to be too expensive, he just removed the engine from his car and figured he could do it himself. Eddie is moving soon, and Clark and Swathi will miss him, especially because he often gives them tips for home and yard projects. I was too tired to puzzled, but I had such a great time talking with everyone.

Today we had an easy morning until about 10:00 and then it was hectic trying to get out the door. Lily and I cleaned the house, packed, and took care of various odds and ends before leaving for our trip to Bear Lake.

Georgia has not been feeling well at all lately with her anxiety and deep fatigue from Parkinson’s, but it was so important to be with family (and important to us for her to join), that she rallied and decided to join us for the Bear Lake excursion.

On the way, Georgia rest in a shady spot while the rest of us visited the Dinosaur Park in Ogden. Lily and the kids had been there before, but it was my first time. I loved it!!! The park did an amazing job of making me feel I was living in prehistoric time with actual dinosaurs. There were even dinosaur sounds coming from speakers around the park. These sounds concerned Clarissa (she thought they were from a dragon), as you can see in this video and the picture below.

I just learned it is not a new thing for Clarissa to be concerned about spooky sounds. Lily also told me that a couple times recently when she has put Clarissa down to bed, Clarissa will hear the air-conditioner and say, “do you hear that? That is a monster.” And Lily will say, “No Clarissa, it is the air-conditioner.” And Clarissa will repeat, “Air Conditioner…”

But as I was saying, the park was awesome!

I took my mask off as soon as I realized we were the only ones in the park except for a few others.

This picture reminded me of parent ducks with ducklings or Abby Road’s album cover. It was cute to see so much beautiful family spread out in a lovely park.

The playgrounds were all roped off because of Carona Virus, but we still had a wonderful time.

We then drove the rest of the way to Bear Lake. The drive was gorgeous and we listened to fun music. Today’s driving playlist consisted of Lucas Graham, Mariah Carey and Alicia Keys. 15 minutes before arriving, Clarissa had a major throw-up from the windy road. I cleaned that when we arrived.

Lydia had been driving us a little bit crazy because of her worry that we would not arrive in time to see fireworks, but we did in-fact arrive with three hours to spare. We also got word that a fireworks show was cancelled, so we thought we wouldn’t see the 4th of July fireworks this year.

When we arrived, we got settled and the children played. Clark and Swathi got Mexican food for everyone (they arrived before us because of our multiple stops for Ammon to pee, and Maddox roles.). It was so good!

After a lot of fun and playing, we put the children down. As I said, we assumed that there were not fireworks this year, but the grown-ups saw tons of fireworks going off around Bear Lake. I slipped into Lydia’s room and quietly retrieved her (from sleeping with Clarissa) so she could enjoy the fireworks. I think some of the other kids saw them too, but I’m not sure because I was busy trying to get Clarissa to fall asleep. I’m so glad Lydia could get her 4th of July wish to see the fireworks. I love that girl!

This morning I finished up some work while Lily and Swathi took all the children to swim lessons. When they got back, everyone had lunch and then we all headed out for our big adventure.

Yesterday when we were all talking, people wanted to get out on an adventure and a hike was suggested. I love the Silver Lake Hike in American Fork canyon so I suggested it. My famous last words were, “I can’t remember if it is a mile and a half each way, or three miles each way.”

I guess I could have looked up the distance, but things always feel busy and chaotic, and it was what I knew, so I just went with it and everyone else was very trusting of me. I figured that if we didn’t make it to the top, we could always turn around half-way and then just fish at the bottom lake, since I brought my poles.

Once we got on the trail, everyone was having a good time. Lily kept repeating to me how gorgeous she thought the scenery was. Here are a bunch of pictures.

This picture really tells a story. This is at about half-way going up. That is when the hike really started to feel long for people and you can see it on Mary’s face. Lydia and Mary would both ask me, “how much farther do we have” and I would say, “I’m not even going to answer that question.” Both of the girls felt like the hike was long, and Lily’s feet and legs were a concern given her challenges with planters fasciitis.

But everyone seemed committed. We never really had the conversation about turning back even though I was totally willing to accommodate for that. Everyone just kept charging up the mountain. When we made it to the top, I was so incredibly proud of all the children. The total distance up was 2.4 miles and the last half of it involves scaling a mountain side up switchbacks. Ammon, Soren, Lydia and Mary all made it up with no assistance. It was a special moment for me to see the kids make it to the top, to climb the mountain, to do something hard. I also felt so happy that now my children will have this memory of hiking 2.4 miles up-hill, and it will be a mental reference point for them that they CAN do it when they are on future hikes with the family (or doing other hard things). Lily, unfortunately, was silently suffering. I was worried about her feet, and she told me they weren’t doing well when I asked her. She too made it through a very difficult climb. I just hope she is able to heal quickly.

Here are some beautiful pictures from near the top of the hike, or at the top of the hike.

We stayed for about an hour at the top, where Silver Lake was. We fished (with no success), people snacked, and children got their feet wet. Also, Clark entertained people by filling his hat with water and putting on his head to drench himself. I was stressfully tying fishing knots (and untangling knots children created) and trying to appease all the children wanting to fish, especially Lydia who get especially frustrated when their is delay or setback. But it was still fun for me to be fishing and to help others fish, even if it was also stressful and chaotic. The lake was BEAUTIFUL!

Something quite magical happened on the way down. Maybe it was the downhill (as opposed to uphill) putting everyone in a better mood, but Lydia and Mary went ahead with Clark and Swathi and I heard a report that they were moving quickly and cheerfully. I struggled a bit with Clarissa when my shoulders got sore, but overall moved well, and Lily was right behind me. I thought about how the days of me carrying children on my shoulder will come to an end soon, and that made me sad, but also happy to have so much time toting around Clarissa, even if my shoulders got extremely sore.

Clarissa had fun in a small stream on the way back. She is obsessed with water, and I would let her off my shoulders at the water to commune with her favorite element 🙂

These are some white flowers I enjoyed towards the end of the trail. It was nice to have them around to take my mind off of the ever increasing ache and fatigue in my body.

In the end, I think everyone enjoyed the hike, even though it was a little intense for people. Clark carried Meera all the way up and down in his arms and I am sure his arms must have gotten sore. Lily’s calves were broken after the hike, and over the next few days, I gave her massages both to help them and to make right what I had led her through. A few days later, Lydia was talking to Lily about a scar she got from when she cut herself with a grapefruit knife. Lily made a profound observation to the effect of. “We move through life in a blur most of the time. Pain can help stamp something in our memory, and in that way it helps us to live more fully.” I think this hike might fit that category. It was very intense for everyone, and the intensity will likely burn it deeper into our memory, but the beauty, joy, and moments with family will be captured along with the pain, and so I think it was worth it for all.