Author: Lily

My fingers are on fire. Well, actually, they just feel like they’re on fire because I chopped a bunch of unusually hot poblanos today. The pain, hours later, is making it so uncomfortable to type that this will be a short post.

After church, I had a chance to talk with Abe about some things that have been on my mind. Actually, we talk about these issues almost daily, and we always go in circles. I’m left with this question: what does it mean to be a humble disciple of Jesus Christ? For example, currently there are a couple social movements within the church where activist members are pushing for change. While I share their confusion (in fact, I am boggled), my primary concern is this: what does Jesus expect of me?

Doesn’t discipleship, at least as its spelled out in the scriptures, mean exerting continual effort to act out of love and kindness? Shouldn’t political issues be ancillary? But when I step out of my own shoes (a heterosexual woman who has zero desire for any church responsibility, least of all the priesthood), and I consider the feelings of those who might feel differently, my heart yearns to respond with love and empathy. I imagine Christ is much more loving and empathetic than I am, and so the plight of those distressed by church doctrine tugs at His heart too.

At the same time, I truly believe this is Christ’s church and that we are led by an actual prophet who receives revelation for the church. I want nothing more than to follow Christ and humbly accept counsel given. The activists among us make the argument that doctrines have changed in the past and can continue to do so; they look hopefully toward the day when change will come. But what if change doesn’t come? What will we do then? Will we leave the church? As Peter said, “Lord, to whom shall we go? Thou has the words of eternal life.”

And so my mind spins and spins, and I am sure I weary out poor Abe (not to mention God) with all of my questions, push-backs, and spiritual wanderings. Like I said, because I can’t solve the issues of the church as a whole, I always come back to the same question: What does it mean to be a humble disciple of Jesus Christ? As a true disciple, should I be actively looking out for those who are different or feel differently than I do? Should I, as a humble disciple, be pushing for change that affects my afflicted brethren and sisters? Or does true discipleship mean humbly, meekly accepting current prophetic direction, waiting patiently on the Lord, and trying my best to be a unifying force in the Kingdom of God?

I guess I’m still searching for the answer there. But trust me, the search is an active one. SO active, that I forgot about my throbbing fingers as I tried to discern answers through typing. (I misplaced my scripture journal a week ago, so this is some of the pent up stuff that would normally go in there.)

Pivoting now towards the actual occurrences of the day, it went like this: church, nap, cook, clean, dinner (with Balu, Swathi’s cousin), Skype with Clark and Swathi, clean, clean, clean, and now blog.

Here are some pictures:

Below is my first attempt to upload a video. This is of Balu reading Lydia a postcard from her beloved stuffed cat. We misplaced the cat on our India trip, but Clark and Swathi found him and have been sending him around the States on an adventure. Every so often a postcard arrives, and Lydia is currently sleeping with the latest one.

This morning I took Lydia on an outing with Misty.

We went to Tony Caputo’s to try cheese and buy some necessities (cheese, gnocchi, chocolate, and a Happy Hippo). We crossed the street to the market, and I got to meet Misty’s friend, Trapper, who sells the best pumpkins from his stand. Afterwards, the three of us wandered through the market tasting everything. Lydia went through three sample cups of popcorn alone, and I feel suitably guilty for not actually buying any popcorn after letting her go to town on their generous, free samples.

Then Misty went home and Lydia and I proceeded on our Saturday morning circuit: Target, Trader Joe’s, Smith’s.

You would have thought that by the end, Lydia would be ready to go home and eat lunch, but unfortunately, all the places we went had fun things for kids (stickers! lollipops! cookies!), and she was less than enthusiastic about going home to take a nap. But home we went, and Lydia spent her whole nap playing vigorous games of pretend.

After nap time, we took the girls on a glorious bike ride up City Creek Canyon. The leaves have changed and the air smelled like Fall. The weather was beautiful, and we were so happy to be out partaking of the season. Fall is my absolute favorite time of year, and dried leaves are my favorite outdoorsy smell. (Pine trees on a mountain might tie for first…oh, and that briny ocean smell is good too. Hmmm…well, let’s just say I like that Fall smell a whole lot and leave it at that.)

When we got home, I cooked up a dinner proposed to me by the cheese guy at Tony Caputo’s: Saute some shallots and melt a half pound (!!!) of Gorgonzola dolce into that. Pour on top of gnocchi, and garnish with fresh thyme. That’s all, and can I just say, Mary ate that Gorgonzola gnocchi with a gusto that she’s thus far only exhibited for ice cream and chocolate chips. It was a good dinner.

After dinner, I cleaned the kitchen, and Tom and Suzanne came over for a bit to play with the girls. After they left, I made that hazelnut mousse chocolate ganache cake for tomorrow’s dessert, and then I spent too much time shopping on Zulily. (Hey, I have free shipping today!)

Today looked gorgeous outside, but I did not step foot outside today–not even to take out the six poopy diapers (go, Mary, go!) hanging out by the door. The girls and I were sick and cranky all day, so we stayed inside to play, read books, and throw tantrums.

It is totally ironic that I want to go to culinary school so badly because my very least favorite part of the day is meal time. Mary gets really impatient and screams from the moment I put her in her high chair until the moment I take her out–or until I produce chocolate chips. In the meantime, Lydia does her share of whining, fit throwing, and peeing–and every time I stop shoveling food into Mary’s mouth in order to take care of Lydia’s problems, Mary goes ballistic. Considering my children eat all day long, by the end of the day, I’m ready to trade lives with anyone. Please, please: Let’s trade.

Also, since I’m in whining mode: Mary was up at all hours of the night last night, and then Lydia woke up bright and early this morning. As wonderfully helpful Abe is when he is 1) home 2) awake, night time is 99.9999% my domain, so I was, um, a little tired today. I’m sure every mom can say that 99.9999% of the time, but hey–it still feels good to mention it.

But the laundry is folded! While I was blogging last night, Abe cleaned the house. It was such a nice surprise.

Since he’s not home yet, I’m not in for that surprise tonight. Oh, and there’s Lydia crying again. (She’s supposed to be asleep.)

[Break in blogging]

All better, for now. I did not take a single photo today, but here are some from yesterday. In the course of my organizing, Mary found a toy that’s been lost in the bins. She loved it, and she played with it again today, so these scenes actually are still relevant.

This morning Misty came over and generously babysat my kids so I could go play the piano for a church meeting at Arlington Hills Nursing Home. I loved playing the piano for those sweet people, and they were so nice. They made me feel like I did a great job, even though I had serious difficulty at every page turn and made a ton of mistakes. What a great group of people.

After I was done, I came home and had a great play date with Misty and her kids.

They were pretending to be a choo-choo train, and Sophia specifically requested a photo shoot. So happy to oblige.

Mary has been so fussy lately that I honestly started to wonder whether she has special needs I just don’t know about. For example, maybe she’s autistic? But she relates really well to me, and she seems socially in tune, so I ruled that out. Abe thinks she’s just teething, but he didn’t watch her turn purple from screaming for an hour today.

Perhaps it’s simply a straightforward addiction to chocolate chips. When I just can’t handle the screaming anymore, I give her a handful of chocolate chips and she transforms into a (somewhat) happy baby. By the end of today, Mary had polished off…a bag???? I think/hope/fear I helped…

Other than feeding my kids a million times and cleaning the kitchen two million times, my main accomplishment today was organizing the toy bins. In the midst of the mess, Mary found a ball on the floor and proceeded to play catch with me for twenty minutes. I did not even know she could throw a ball! Obviously, she can not actually catch one, but our game nevertheless bore a striking resemblance to catch.

Abe spent the evening studying and is practically at death’s door from exhaustion, so this is me hurrying up and finishing this blog. I still need to clean the whole house (it is a TOTAL wreck) before going to bed. Since Abe is pretty much in bed already, I need to work fast!

Today Lydia was supposed to go to preschool, but I was so tired last night I did not read the preschool email properly and got mixed up about the location. By the time I contacted the host mom, preschool was almost done. Lydia was heartbroken not to see her friends, but the good news was this: Dan and Preethi were in town for one extra day! Also, Kristin and her girls were still here until almost noon, so Lydia still got to see lots of friends today.

When we got home, we played a little inside and then moved our play date outside. A brilliant transition! It was gloriously beautiful today–even warm enough for Lydia and Nat to play in the water. Can you believe we just had snow recently, and now it’s warm enough for the kids to play in the water outside? I’m not complaining, though.

We literally took over a hundred pictures, and it was incredibly difficult to pick which ones to include in the blog. I have about forty pictures in my WordPress media library ready to insert into this post, so we’ll see how good I am at narrowing down these gems.

 

 

We will miss the Harbucks so much, but we feel really blessed to have been able to spend the time we did with them while they were in town.

After the play date, I put the girls and myself down for afternoon naps. Well, what really happened is first I had some cake. Abe made fun of me because during our phone conversation after the play date I kept trying to end by saying, “Well, you must be busy so I guess I’ll let you go.” He kept telling me that he actually had some time to chat and wanted more details about the play date (he was jealous I got to spend more time with the amazing Harbucks and he didn’t), but finally I just came out and told him I had to get off the phone because I NEEDED to eat the last piece of cake, and I just could not focus on anything else until that happened.

After my cake, I lay in bed and slept for an entire hour. It was so blissful that at one point, I thought I heard someone breaking into the house, and I didn’t even care. They can break in, I thought. As long as I can keep lying here, I don’t care if anyone steals all of our stuff. But, thankfully, the noises I heard were probably just house creaks, and when I finally got out of bed, everyone and everything was safe. Phew.

Post nap I fed the girls, talked on the phone with my beloved mom and grandma, played with Mary (Lydia was watching the iPad), vacuumed (one-handed, holding Mary) the entire downstairs and basement, roasted squash, and practiced the piano (I have to play at a nursing home tomorrow).

I sent Abe out to do some errands, and when he gets home, I hope to have accomplished 1) this blog post, 2) cleaning the kitchen 3) folding one of the four loads of clean laundry currently hanging out in my bedroom.

So…I took pictures today, but I never noticed that there was no card in my camera. Darn! Lydia spent the whole day playing with Kristin’s girls, and there were some sweet moments. Selah loves to read to Lydia, and Lydia LOVES having Selah read to Lydia. I am so upset I don’t have the pictures I took of this darling activity.

I wish I had some funny things to say or super exciting things to report, but I spent most of the day cooking food for a dinner party with our friends: Dan and Preethi (with kids, Nat and Kina), Morgan and Jesse (with son, Daniel), and Kristin (with kids, Selah, Liesl, and Ana-Lena). We put the ALL the kids to bed before the party, and they were great sleepers.

I made some phyllo tarts that I don’t have pictures of, a beet/arugula/goat cheese salad and this chocolate-hazelnut mousse cake:

We had SO much fun visiting with our friends that it is now past midnight, so all I have left in me is to post this recipe (for Preethi, with love!).

Here it is, in all its straight-from-Gourmet glory (I quadrupled everything for the party):

Chickpea, Eggplant, and Tomato Phyllo Tarts (serves 4)

1 (1 lb) eggplant

Salt

1/2 c. extra virgin olive oil

1 med onion, halved lengthwise and cut crosswise into 1/2-inch-thick slices

1 Turkish bay leaf or 1/2 California bay leaf

3 garlic cloves, minced

1 (14-15 oz) can stewed tomatoes, drained, juice reserved, and coarsely chopped

1/2 t. sweet paprika

1/8 t. ground cumin

1 (15-to-19 oz) can chickpease, rinsed and drained

1 tsp sugar

Freshly ground pepper

1/4 c. coarsely chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley

6 (17-by-12-inch) phyllo sheets, thawed if frozen

Garnish: fresh flat-leaf parsley leaves, torn in pieces

Make the filling: Peel eggplant and cut into 1/2-inch cubes. Toss with 1 tsp salt in a large bowl and let stand for 15 minutes. Transfer eggplant to a colander, rinse under cold water, and squeeze out excess water.

Heat 2 Tbsp. oil i a 12-inch heavy skillet over moderately high heat until hot but not smoking. Add onion with bay leaf and cook, stirring occasionally, until golden, about 5 mintues. Add 1 Tbsp oil, then add eggplant and garlic and cook, stirring, until eggplant is tender, 8-10 minutes.

Add tomatoes (reserve juice), paprika, and cumin and cook, stirring, for 3 minutes. Add reserved tomato juice, chickpeas, sugar, 3/4 tsp salt, and 1/8 tsp pepper, and simmer, stirring occasionally, until filling is thickened and most of liquid as evaporated about 5 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in parsley; discard bay leaf.

Make the tarts: Put rack in middle of oven and preheat oven to 425. Line a large baking sheet with foil.

Unroll phyllo and cover stack with plastic wrap and a dampened kitchen towel. Keeping remaining phyllo covered, lightly brush 1 phyllo sheet with some of remaining oil. Top with 2 more sheets, brushing each with oil. Sprinkle with 1/2 tsp. pepper, then cut stack crosswise in half with a sharp knife. Spoon 1 c. filling into center of each stack. Crumple edges of phyllo up and around filling, leaving filling exposed. Transfer to lined baking sheet using a spatula. Make 2 more tarts in same manner, arranging about 1/2 in apart on baking sheet.

Bake, rotating baking sheet after 10 minutes, until edges of tarts are golden, 15-20 minutes. Sprinkle with parsley and serve immediately.

The filling can be made up to 1 day ahead and refrigerated, covered.

The tarts can be baked up to 6 hours ahead and kept, uncovered, at room temperature. Reheat in a 350 oven for 15-20 minutes.

I am kicking myself for not taking the girls to Red Butte Gardens today. The weather was gorgeous, today was the monthly free day, and our play group was meeting there to boot. But Lydia said she wanted to go to the children’s museum, so I made a split second decision and went there instead. However, the girls were in heaven with all of the toys and activities, and I always love to watch them have fun–especially when I am not the fun generator.

Lydia loved the water toys.

Afterward, we dashed into Old Navy because at the rate Lydia pees on her pants these days, we need more.

On the way home, both children fell asleep, and so I decided not to wake them up when we pulled in the drive. Instead, I rolled down the windows and practiced meditating. I kept getting distracted by 1) a dog barking 2) a bird rustling in the bush 3) wondering if I will ever be good at meditating. I will say that even though I was distracted, it felt nice to be electronics-free and attentive to my surroundings.

Then the girls woke up and ate lunch, after which I immediately put them both back to bed. Mary proceeded to sleep for the next three hours, while Lydia just played lively games of pretend in her room by herself. I spent most of the time on the phone with a local culinary school recruiter, and I finally cut her off because I had a strong suspicion Lydia had pooped in her little potty in the midst of playing pretend.

I was right! And not only that, but there was poop on the carpet too. However, Lydia had done a surprisingly good job cleaning herself off and putting new undies on. She had also donned a pair of Mary’s pajama shorts, only she had put both legs into one leg opening and the other pant leg flapped behind like a tail. She informed me that she was wearing a “tutu.” A great imagination at work.

She then helped me make dinner, and the moment I stuck the dish in the oven, Mary woke up. I felt blessed by God because it would have been SO hard to make that chopping intensive dish with an awake Mary (which equals a one-handed Lily).

After dinner and baths, we were just getting the girls ready for Family Home Evening when we heard the front screen door slam. It was kind of terrifying, and Abe ran down to see who was there. Who should it be but my dear friend Kristin–the one who gave me long distance magnetic therapy not long ago! She is a single mother with three young children, and she had just flown in from a long journey. Her luggage had been delayed until tomorrow morning, and so she was stranded here in Salt Lake (she lives in Manti).

I was sorry for her dilemma but incredibly excited because that means — we get to have a sleepover! The last sleepover I had with Kristin was when I was a senior in college. I remember roasting asparagus, eating chocolate from the co-op and talking for hours. This time we get to do it again, only it’s five children later. Can you believe how time flies?

After Kristin got settled in, I came upstairs to find her fiver-year-old daughter, Selah, reading books to Lydia. What a sweetheart. We cut The Giving Tree short, though, so Abe could put on a puppet show about prayer. Then it was scriptures, prayers, and bedtime.

Now it’s upload-picture time and then bedtime for me!

Oh–and I am on the Martha Stewart Blog!!!!!!

General Conference Sunday was a pajama day for everyone but Abe, who had to drive to Idaho an hour after the afternoon conference ended. Since we can watch conference from our computers (could not get our television working, sadly), we didn’t have to leave the house. We did go to the park after the second session of conference, but everyone except Abe was in pajamas, and it was with great reluctance that I even donned a bra. I am still wearing what I was wearing when I went to bed last night, only now I’m decorated in food smudges and cookie crumbs. Perhaps after I blog I shall shower and change into a fresh set of jammies.

Except that there is something more I want to do, and that is: research culinary school. Abe called me up during his drive to Idaho, and he was very excited about a certain daydream we’ve had for a couple years. Up until now, it’s only been a day dream, but he seems to think it’s an actual possibility. Who knows…we are always thinking up new life plans, and but after our conversation this evening, I think culinary school is at least worth looking into.

So let’s do another day in pictures, shall we? Only first, can I just say that I kind of loved the talk wherein the speaker compared spiritual fitness to physical fitness?  I want to recommit to certain areas of spiritual development (family history, in particular) so I can become more masterful and spiritually fit. If you aren’t LDS, you might think doing family history is a strange way to become more spiritually fit, but in a Mormon paradigm, I think it makes perfect sense. That talk also made me want to just delve into the scriptures for hours every day, or at very least meditate with more regularity and discipline.

I’m sad General Conference is over, and I’m even more sad that I missed so much of it this weekend. Hopefully I can watch some of the talks I missed during the girls’ naps this week, and I can not wait until the conference issue of the Ensign comes out.

Okay, enough blabbing. Here are today’s photos:

I am taking a break from having children. I mean, I want more eventually, but right now, my cup runneth over at two. Last night I got up multiple times to attend to hungry/poopy/crying children, and this morning Lydia wet the bed at 6am (Abe got up that time. Thank-you, Honey.). Just as I sat down to blog, Lydia ,who was still awake because we didn’t think to stick her mattress cover in the dryer until right before bedtime, freaked out and poured her full potty all over the white carpet in her bedroom.

Sigh.

Shall we just do this day’s post in pictures? That sounds nice to me.

We went over to Dan’s parents’ house for the second session of General Conference.

The next bajillion shots were taken by the incredibly generous Preethi. I read an article a while back about this one mom who did not want photos taken of her post-baby. She then had this epiphany that her kids needed pictures of her being with them so they could look back and see how present she was in their lives. It was a really pretty article, and ever since I’ve been thinking I need more pictures showing that I am present in my kids’ lives. The only problem is, I, like the author, abhor my post-baby body fat and have a slight aversion to cameras. But I am so glad Preethi took these photos because one day Mary will grow up and probably not want to be around me all the time, so I will have these to remind me what a cuddly relationship we once had.

Here are Mary and Kina together.

Also, Nat was so sweet and took Lydia’s hand to lead her to his gym.

Since I was busy doing errands and getting distracted by cuteness, I only heard conference in snippets. The talk that I am most sad I missed was President Uchtdorf’s talk.

Everyone is talking about it, and from things I’ve heard and read, it was a great sermon on allowing every one the right to worship or not worship according to the dictates of their own conscience. He emphasized how we should not judge those who choose to worship differently than we do or who abandon our beloved religion (and perhaps break out hearts in the process). Wouldn’t this world be better if we all decided not to judge each other? Sign me up!!!

Today we had a really special play date with our friends, the Harbucks, who are in town from D.C.. Dan was angelic and babysat the children all morning while I got to make waffles and chat with Preethi. I follow her awesome blog with devoted regularity, and when I met Kina (her baby who is one week older than Mary), I honestly felt like I was meeting a celebrity. If you check out her blog or scroll down on this blog, you will see that Kina is a stunning child, but trust me–she is even better in person. And I always have Nat in mind when I pray daily for God to prepare a good husband for Lydia. He gave me a sweet hug at the end of the play date, and that about just made my day.

All of our play dates are Lydia centric, and so the result is Mary doesn’t interact with kids her age very much. In other words, she lacks friends. I was SO excited to see her play with Kina, and oh my goodness, I about had a cute heart attack seeing these two together. I can’t wait until they get to play again (tomorrow!).

After our wonderful play date, I took an actual nap while both kids napped. It was delicious. Then they woke up and I realized it was almost dinner time and I did not know what we were going to eat. After frantically thumbing through several cookbooks, I settled on a vegetarian chili recipe from a cookbook Dan and Preethi gave us when we got married. (They created the cookbook themselves, so we not only had a play date with them, but we ate their chili tonight, too!)

After dinner and bedtime, I raced around cleaning the house because my wonderful home teacher from Evanston arrived tonight and will be staying with us this weekend. This weekend is our church’s General Conference, which is basically like Salt Lake’s Mardi Gras for Mormons. Everyone converges upon the city and it is prayers and parties galore for two straight days.

We’re looking forward to it tomorrow!