Well, we are finally settled into our new house, and so we figured it was time to get serious about Lydia’s schedule. Her sleep routine was out of hand. Abe had started to joke that soon she’d require him to rub his tummy and pat his head while singing Old MacDonald Had a Farm in order for her to sleep. As it was, he had to hold her while hopping up and down on one foot and leaning at just the right angle, or else she absolutely refused to fall asleep. When I put her down, I often had to spend about an hour feeding, swaddling, changing, reswaddling, refeeding, and rechanging…and then I’d jiggle her all the way to her crib and put her down about six times before she’s actually go to sleep. I was actually starting to develop back pain from the hour long process.
When we explained our routine to the pediatrician, she scared us witless by saying that she’d met three year olds who still require their parents to do similar routines and hold them until they fall asleep. She suggested we let Lydia cry it out so that Lydia could learn to self soothe.
And that is what we’ve been doing for the past couple days…and it’s working! At first it was brutal to hear her cry for so long, but every time we put her down now, she cries less and less. Last night she cried for a total of FIVE short minutes, and then she slept so long I started to worry. When I realized she’d been sleeping for nine hours, I went into her room to make sure she was still alive. Lo and behold, not only was she still alive, but she was awake and playing by herself with her little pink monkey. I could not believe my eyes! Up to this point, Lydia has needed constant and direct adult stimulation every waking minute of her life, but there she was–happily playing away with Minkey (her monkey)! Wow, wow, WOW. Abe and I are thrilled.
Here’s what I’m not thrilled about. I have been enduring painful exercise sessions five days a week for over a month and I can’t remember the last time I ate anything sugary…and I still weigh the same as I did in APRIL! Can you believe it? I even checked out The Idiot’s Guide to Weight Loss to see what I’m doing wrong. That book says to throw out the scale and judge yourself on how clothes fit, but as far as I can tell, I can’t fit into any of my old clothes. I suppose there is a possibility some fat is turning to muscle since some people (namely, my mom and Abe) keep telling me I look like I’m losing weight, but at some point, doesn’t the number on the scale have to go down?? It’s so sad. I have had more than one dream about all of the desserts I’ve passed up, and I always wake up from those dreams hungry and grumpy.
Oh well. The real purpose of this whole program is so that I’m healthy for baby #2, and I really do feel a lot more energy and health. So that’s good. When I get pregnant again, I am going to try to continue avoiding sugar and exercising five days a week, and maybe–just maybe!–I won’t gain another 70 lbs. But to end on a positive note, I have really enjoyed not being alone in this post-baby weight loss journey. My friend Ashley and I have been emailing each other about our goals and praying for each other, and that has been immensely helpful. There have been days when I would not have reached my goals if it weren’t for her support. One day I got up and really did not want to run at all, but I thought of her and felt like I’d be disappointed if she didn’t reach her goals that day–so I didn’t want to let her down, either! I spent my whole run praying for us both, and we both ran longer than we thought we could that day. God really does answer prayers.
Oh, and that reminds me! One more happy thing. I have really felt God answering my prayers when I pray to know how to mother Lydia. I’m not sure where my journal is, so even though this is normally material for my journal, I think I’ll blog it before I forget that it happened. When we were in Moab at the hotel (before we started cry it out), I felt at a total loss for how to get Lydia to take her nap. I knew she was tired, but we were in a new place with a different bassinet, and I just felt extremely daunted by the prospect of putting her down. So I said a prayer that God would show me how to put her down, and right away thoughts came into my head about what to do next. I started to do things I don’t normally do, but I just kept following the impressions I was getting. The whole time I kept thinking “There’s no way this is going to work,” but I followed the Spirit anyway–and fifteen minutes later, Lydia was sound asleep. It was a miracle. That’s not the only time something like that has happened, but since it was the most recent event, I figured I should record it before I forgot.
Sorry for the epic blog post! Now I need to go and find my journal…