Month: July 2019

I was very grumpy for most of this day because I thought that the girls had kept everyone up the night before. I was barricaded in the guest room with Clarissa and Ammon so I didn’t know what was going on. All I knew is that they were up at 10pm, and I was upset that they might have kept Soren up (since I know he doesn’t normally stay up that late!). I

So I told the girls they wouldn’t have that chance again and told them we would spend the entire day outside. I said after we picked up Abe from the airport we could go home and transfer them to bed at 10:30pm. They were sad and upset that they wouldn’t get to go to Clark and Swathi’s until night time, but I was determined.

Then I called Clark in the afternoon and found out the girls had been telling the truth. It wasn’t a problem that they stayed up late with Soren, and Clark and Swathi thought their cousin play time was cute. So I finished the last outing and headed back for dinner at their house before packing people in the car to go pick up Abe.

Had I not been is such a horrible mood, this day would have been a highlight. We went to Northwest Trek on Julie’s suggestion, and it was AMAZING. It is sooooo beautiful and original. It’s basically a zoo but the animals are in their natural habitat. You can ride a tram and see them all roaming around. It is gorgeous scenery, has a great play area, and is just an incredible place to visit. We’ll have to go again and rewrite our memory of this visit. I didn’t get a ton of pictures but here are some:

Second outing:

After that we drove back to Clark and Swathi’s, ate dinner, and then…drove to the airport to pick up Abe!!! It was so great to see him again. Three days felt like an eternity!

On Tuesday I took the kids (except for Meera, who stayed home with Joanna) to the Museum of Flight in Seattle. It is an incredible museum, but the best half is the second half which we didn’t see until we were all too tired to really appreciate it. We’ll go back sometime!

After we finished at the museum, we went back to Clark and Swathi’s for dinner, playing outside, and bedtime. I think somewhere in there the kids watched the Spiderman movie.

On Monday the kids had a play date at Julie’s house while she went to the dentist. I followed the babies around, folded a ton of laundry, and packed us up. The kids were mostly self-sufficient and most ended up jumping on the trampoline. I was shocked at how pleasant it was to babysit eight kids!

Then Julie made everyone lunch before we loaded our vans with kids and drove to Point Defiance State Park. That is a gorgeous park! The views of the ocean are just breath taking. We spent the whole time at the zoo, and it was maybe my favorite zoo ever (although Chicago’s Lincoln Park Zoo does hold a special place in my heart). But Point Defiance has a zoo AND an aquarium, not to mention the many fabulous play areas and beeeee-autiful setting.

They have camel rides! We almost passed on it, but I really liked the thought that the kids would have a tactile entry point into nativity scenes with the three magi.

After the zoo, we headed over the Clark and Swathi’s for dinner, play time outside, and then an attempt at bedtime. Clarissa was not very cooperative about sleeping, but eventually we all fell asleep and that was glorious!

On Sunday we slept in, visited with Julie when she and her kids got back from church, and headed over to Clark and Swathi to celebrate Clark’s birthday. Well, I spent hours napping on their bed until it was time for Abe to head to the airport. I felt so depressed (and honestly, a little terrified) at the thought that he was leaving that I almost hopped in the car and drove back to Utah. But the kids really wanted to finish out the trip and I was feeling well enough to imagine actually being able to do that. So we stayed.

The kids had a great time playing with their cousins and some friends of Swathi’s.

After Abe left, we headed back to Julie’s and I put the kids down before spending an hour chatting with Wes and Julie before bed. Then I went down to the basement, finished my mystery novel, and went to bed. An hour later Clarissa woke up with lots of energy. When she’s in that middle-of-the-night wakeful-but-happy mood, she is incredibly charming. So I played and chatted with her for two hours before finally convincing her to go back to sleep. Luckily, I had slept a lot at Clark and Swathi’s so this was actually fun and not hard.

On Saturday (my mom’s birthday!) we packed up and went down to the ferry terminal early because we hadn’t booked a return trip home. We figured we didn’t want to tie ourselves down to a specific time and thought returning standby would work fine.

Turns out one of the earlier ferries had been cancelled, and so now there was NO standby room because all of the earlier reservations were being put on the subsequent ferries. We lined up in the very last lot of cars for people without reservations not knowing if we would even get back that day. After parking, waiting, and figuring out we would be there for hours, we wandered to the farmer’s market, where we promptly lost Ammon.

Abe was tired and I turned around for maybe a minute to examine some cream that supposedly took away aches and pains, and when I looked back to where Ammon was supposed to be, he was gone. Now, Ammon is frequently gone so at first we didn’t worry. But after running around the very small market and not seeing him, I started to panic. A lot of people started looking with me, and within five minutes Abe found Ammon literally running around the market. We must have kept missing him because he was running. I don’t know how.

Anyway, after that scare I didn’t take my eyes off of him for a minute. We walked around and then decided to drop him and Clarissa off in this fabulous little drop-in child care center on main street. Then we took the older kids to lunch. It was INCREDIBLE to eat lunch and ice cream with just Mary and Lydia! We weren’t stressed they would run away or start screaming at some random thing. I couldn’t believe how easy everything was. And then I started the mental math to how long we have until Ammon and Clarissa are easy travelers. If they had personalities like Mary and Lydia, we’ll be free and easy in three or four years. Since they are both far more energetic than Lydia or Mary ever were, maybe it’s more like five or six years? Sob.

After lunch, we headed picked up the babies and fed them our leftovers. I started feeling really sick an hour or so later and started having diarrhea, which is NOT fun when you are stuck in a hot parking lot waiting until who-knows-when to board a ferry. I kept making emergency dashes to the public restroom two blocks away, and finally in the evening when we thought we weren’t going to make it back that day, Abe was my hero and checked me into a motel six blocks away so I could go lie down, throw up, and use the bathroom as much as I needed to. I walked the six blocks and almost made it to the room without throwing up, but didn’t quite make it. It was HEAVEN to lie down right next to a bathroom. I had a mystery novel that I read when I didn’t feel like I was about to die.

Abe took care of the kids for HOURS on end this day. He entertained them in a small little park across from the ferry parking lot. I don’t know how he did it, but he did it with a kind, upbeat attitude and a smile on his face.

After an hour, Abe found out they were actually scheduling a special ferry just for all of the people who had waited all day. So after a couple hours of recovery, I walked back to the car before we boarded the at 10:30pm. Everyone stayed in the car and slept the entire ferry ride over, and we didn’t make it to my friend Julie’s house in Puyallup until 3am. Julie as an ANGEL and was so sweet and welcoming when we pulled into her drive at that obscene hour.

On Thursday night I slept with Clarissa because it was too cold to let her sleep in the little Kidco tent we brought with us on the trip. She started the night by hugging the hot water bottle like a stuffie but then ended up with her feet on my belly and spent the rest of the night grunting and pushing against my belly so that she could poop. She pooped twice in the course of several hours.  I didn’t sleep much that night, but I adored sleeping with my baby. Her movements and sounds (if not the, um, smells) were so adorable.

In the morning we ate breakfast at the mess tent with the babies while the girls played and colored happily together. After breakfast, we piled in the car and headed over to the Pelindaba Lavender Farm. Both of our phones were about to die, which is HORRIBLE because the lavender farm was beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. But we did get some pictures before our phones died:

Ever since I visited the south of France as a child and smelled all of the lavender soaps and sachets there, I have associated the smell of lavender with sunshine, summer vacation, and France. Even with those amazing connotations, I can’t say I’ve always loved its spicy, assertive fragrance. It’s only recently that I have really started to fall in love with its scent, and visiting the lavender farm was a total turning point. Being there with my family, watching my kids run through the lavender, and reading its history (it was the culinary equivalent of rosemary until relatively recently!), I am smitten.

After the lavender farm, we visited Lime Kiln State park to look for whales. We didn’t see any there, although the girls had fun tidepooling and Ammon made a friend on top of the cliff. We didn’t let him climb down it to the tidepools, so he sat next to a grandma watching her granddaughter clamber around the tidepools below, struck up a conversation–as he does with literally EVERYONE–and became fast friends.

Afterward on our drive to Friday Harbor, we saw orcas playing in the ocean! We pulled over and sat next to a friendly Dutch family and watched them play. I didn’t get any pictures of the whales but I got a picture of where we saw them:

As we drove around the island, we saw a lot of beautiful, creamy shrubbery on the sides of the road. I snapped some pictures as we drove by just because this creamy, rusty plant was so ubiquitous on San Juan Island.

Then we drove to Friday Harbor and had the most delicious shellfish and clam chowder for lunch. Afterward we had ice cream. When Mary presented Clarissa with a purple cone of ice cream, she was dumbfounded. Then she spread out her arms, stomped her right foot, and grabbed the cone in delight. Come to think of it, this is her first real ice cream cone. (She’s had plenty of soft serve Dairy Queen and plenty of ice cream in bowls, but this was her first time having real ice cream in a cone.) I think she liked it:

Ammon also liked his:

And then he fell asleep from all of the activity.

We went to the whale museum while he napped. Abe and I took turns with him in the car. While I was in the museum, Lydia and I met the loveliest teenage girl who was teaching kids about whale bones. She was absolutely DARLING. So engaged with the kids and so fun to talk to. I love meeting wonderful youth. They give me hope for the future.

After that we went back to the campsite. Abe dropped me off in the tent for a GLORIOUS nap while he drove back to Friday Harbor for more of the whale museum and picked up some pizza. At some point he also played games with the kids:

We finished the day with pizza and s’mores.

After all of this I gave the three kids a shower in the camp bathroom. My foot was really hurting and I get stressed in those small camp showers trying to keep clean clothes dry and off the ground. Also, I had to physically put my hand in front of a sensor for water to come out of the shower, and so I was shampooing all of my kids with the other hand. And Mary didn’t want to shower. So, I was a bit snappy with my kids and since it was rush hour in the camp bathroom, everyone could hear me. I was so tired I was beyond caring…until it came time to brush everyone’s teeth and Ammon’s gums started bleeding from the boo-boo that happened on the first night of the trip. At that point, he announced to the whole bathroom crowd that the reason his boo-boo was bleeding was because I yelled at him, he bled, and he was sad.

I about died. So many women threw me dirty looks, although one was really nice and told him that his mom loved him very much. It was a little disquieting though because then she told me repeatedly that I had really good kids. I was dying of shame by that point. I must have come across as this really abusive, terrible mom for everyone to think not only did I not appreciate my kids, but I might also abuse them! I did not go back to the bathroom for the rest of our time on San Juan island. It was painful, but not as painful as being that embarrassed.

Maybe some day I will lose the capacity for feeling shame. I thought I was beyond it when I was trying to get my kids clean in the shower. But just minutes later I realized, nope. I can still feel embarrassed. I don’t know if it’s just me, but it seems motherhood gives ample opportunities for me to venture beyond the realm of humility into just downright shame.

After that, I was ready for bed. Lydia and Ammon snuggled, Abe and Mary snuggled, and Clarissa and I snuggled. Clarissa slept much better this night, which was sooooo wonderful and felt like an answer to prayer.

On Thursday we ate breakfast at a delicious, adorable place in Bellingham recommended in the Airbnb host guide. I think it was called Marvin’s Cafe, and there was a cute grocery store attached.

Then we drove to Anacortes and boarded a ferry for the San Juan islands. The views on all of the ferry rides we took were just amazing. They all kind of blend together in memory–lots of gorgeous, verdant islands on blue, blue ocean.

When we got to the island, we drove to Lakedale Resort, where we were glamping. We had never glamped before and it was so fun! I was so sad I didn’t take a picture of the tent and its furnishings. After dropping off our bags, we wandered around and decided to rent a boat and paddle around the lake.

After our boat ride we drove around the island. The small towns were all gussied up for the Fourth of July.

All of the restaurants seemed closed, so we went to the grocery store and got some rotisserie chicken and some other things, ate in the car while Clarissa slept, and then staked out our spot to watch fireworks. We got the PERFECT spot, which was basically golden handcuffs–we had to guard it for four hours straight. We took turns walking Clarissa around the town while waiting. (In retrospect we should have used the time to check out Fourth of July beach, but we didn’t know if it would be hard to find a spot to see the fireworks. Turns out it wouldn’t have been that hard.)

Then we drove home and transferred everyone successfully to bed. There were toasty hot water bottles waiting for us in our tent! They made all of the difference too, because it does get chilly at night.

On Wednesday we dropped Jean off at the airport before heading over to the Vancouver Art Museum. Wow was it a dud. It is so small and there was very little art inside, although they did have three Emily Carr paintings (towards which we all automatically gravitated). There was also an exhibition going on about Alberto and Diego Giacommetti, and that was good too. Other than that, the only other good piece of art was a photograph of a man filling up a glass of water at a fountain in Rome.

After the museum, we ate some delicious food truck gyros and hot dogs and then walked to the Chinese garden, soooo far away. If my foot weren’t in such pain that walk would have been a highlight for me. But it was still wonderful to experience the city on foot with my family, and we got some great donuts en route!

After the Chinese Garden, we drove to the Canadian American border.

Then we drove to Bellingham and did a drive-in for dinner:

Then because of the layout of the Airbnb, Abe and I were able to watch Game of Thrones after the kids went to bed. Abe was had a complete mental breakdown that evening, and so it was really nice to have some down time to recover.

The next morning we slept in and then drove to join Clark and Swathi’s crew at Capilano suspension bridge. After the bridge there are a whole lot of walkways and staircases built into the rain forest, and it’s all very impressive.

After this stop, we went downtown for some Thai food for lunch. After lunch we headed next door to a Korean shaved ice house for incredible shaved ice. The red bean was my favorite.

Then we went to VanDusen Botanical Gardens. I liked them even more than Butchart because there weren’t so many people. They were incredible.

I am completely aghast that we did not take more pictures. The purple delphinium garden was mind blowing and we don’t have one picture! I think maybe I didn’t have my phone to take pictures and Abe was busy wrangling Clarissa most of the time. I don’t know, but I adored these gardens and feel sad we don’t have more pictures of just the plants. Oh, well. Guess we’ll just have to go back some time!!

On Sunday morning we went to the Museum of Anthropology. It was so quiet and peaceful in that museum before our family entered. People were walking reflectively along, studying the totem poles and artifacts and hardly talking at all.

Then we came. And, as you can see below, we weren’t a quiet bunch.

Going with small kids to a museum sometimes feels like torture to me. The older kids are great–they can learn by doing scavenger hunts or reports or just reading and looking at everything. Younger kids…well, at least my younger kids just want to run through the halls. I try whispering and dramatizing the exhibits to catch their attention, but it usually catches for approximately one second before they are off again.

The torture part comes in because these museums are SO rich and beautiful and full of artful, educational displays. They’re Disneyland for adults. But I can’t really take time to learn very much because I am so busy chasing and trying to quiet my kids. Honestly, just looking at pictures from this outing makes my heart pound a little harder with stress. So sad because it was a gorgeous museum. I told myself all weekend that I would come back when the kids are older and re-do everything again. I need to override the stress that happens when I look at so many of these pictures.

Then we drove to one of Vancouver’s big beach parks and watched a puppet show to celebrate Canada Day.

The kids were so excited to get Canada flags on Canada Day!Then we went back to the airbnb and swam in the pool across the street. My favorite part was being alone with Mary and helping her learn how to swim better (or, honestly, just pain swim). It was so delightful to have one on one time with her and I hope we can figure out how to do that more regularly.

Happy Canada Day!