Month: June 2020

Today was a really good, even magical day. I slept in until 9:15 and felt like the rest really did me some good. I then got Clarissa, got ready for the day and helped around the house while Lily did a ton of cooking in the kitchen. She made Borscht soup, Keesh, Soufle, and a buckwheat chocolate cake. Around 12:00 I did my monthly deep meditation, and it was one of my favorites to this date. Afterwords, the kids ate and I put Clarissa down.

After Clarissa went down, Lily and I said happy birthday over Zoom to our dear friend Preethi. Ammon wandered into our room to show us he was playing dress up.

Then, I studied up on what to teach the children regarding current events and the Black Lives Matter movement. I watched this incredible Sesame Street town hall with CNN to address the topic, and I thought it was perfect for home church. Also, Lily ordered a Black Lives Matter sign the feels very loving and unifying and I love it, and I love her for ordering it!

Lily was exhausted and I’m so glad she took a nap after all that cooking. When I felt ready, I conducted home church with the kids. After discussing baptism a bit (answering some questions Mary has had) we watched the Sesame Street Town hall and discussed racism as a family. Lily joined us for the end of the lesson. Lydia gets bored or uncomfortable when Lily and I preach on a subject we feel passionate about, but we really hope our children understand that not everyone has life as good or easy as we do, and it’s a central part of being a good person to listen to, care for, and do something about people who are suffering, oppressed, marginalized, and/or vulnerable. Home church was a perfect place to talk about this, but Jesus was an incredible example of standing with the oppressed. We say Black Lives Matter right now instead of All Lives Matter, because white people are affirmed every day in a million ways by the institutions in our society, by the ways that stereotyping plays out, by narratives of history, by who has the most power and money in society, and just simply by being the majority. This is one moment, an especially important moment to affirm and stand with our black brothers and sisters, and perhaps most importantly to just listen and learn about why they are hurting, and how we can help be a part of the solution. #BlackLivesMatter.

Then we had the sacrament and wrapped up. We’ve been using the “Hymns2” soundtrack by Voicemale for music accompaniment.

Then went to our room to rest some more, and work on a project to review some of her friends poetry which she committed to them she would do. I was reflecting today that I love my job, especially on Monday, but by Friday I feel burnt out and like I need to get away from it. Our family is Lily’s job, I’m so glad when she can have a moment to step a way. She had that tonight and I was so grateful for it. She’s been clicking on all cylinders during the week, cooking, cleaning, reading to kids, playing with kids, teaching kids, correcting kids, giving, giving, giving. So so so glad she got some time tonight.

And while she was getting some time, we were enjoying the fruits of all her cooking. Dinner was SO good. She made a blended borscht that tasted delicious and complex. Her mushroom quiche was unbelievable and we also had fresh strawberries as a side. But what really stole the show was the buckwheat chocolate cake she made. I made a berry sauce from fresh strawberries, raspberry jam and a frozen berry medley (added some sugar) and put it on the cake and added ice cream and whipped cream. IT WAS SOOOO GOOOD.

After dinner I finished watching “Harriet” with the children. Honestly, it might be one of the best movies I have ever seen. Harriet Tubman just made my top 5 list of heroes, right up there with Jesus, Mr. Rogers, and Abe Lincoln. I was so inspired by her her faith and commitment to working righteousness, not just for slaves, but later in her life for woman’s rights and caring for the Elderly. What an incredible woman. Her fight for what was right was often at the risk of her own life. Not many people fight the fight for justice at that level. She did, and I’m amazed. She continued to risk her life for others after she had her freedom. I’m blown away. Such a good movie. Her courage, her faith. I can’t say enough about her.

During the movie, Ammon and Clarissa played wonderfully together in the background. They were such good play pals. Here are some pictures of them horsing around together earlier today. I forgot exactly when I took these:

Today I woke up late. I was going to go on a bike-ride, but it’s been so rainy that my friend and I postponed for one week.

As soon as I woke up, I had a Zoom call with my AXB college group. I was so excited to talk to them to process with them all that is happening in the world. One of my AXB friends, Andrew, has devoted a large share of his life to improving a distressed neighborhood in Philadelphia, and all of my AXB brothers have sensitive hearts when it comes to social justice. It was so healing and informative to talk to them.

After that, I played in the sandbox with my children. It was sooooo much fun! It actually took me back and made me think of when I used to play in my friend Anthony’s sandbox as a child. We’d build up river banks, and then bring in the hose in and frantically try to build and repair the banks as the water eroded them. With the children, we did a lot of landscaping. We built tunnels, rivers, castles, and bridges. When the water came in repairs needed to be made! I had such a good time. It totally drew me in and entertained the kids. At one point, Lydia turned to me and said, “Dad, if I could have one thing in the world, you know what it would be?” I told her I didn’t know. She said, “Nothing.” Fathers live for moments like that. She asked me what I would want if I could have anything in the world. I just said that other people who don’t share our privileges could have better lives. More on that in tomorrow’s blog.

We had Lily’s amazing potato pancakes for lunch. I LOVE Lily’s potato pancakes.

Lily was super busy in the morning exercising, cooking and being productive, but she slowed down in the afternoon, which I was grateful to see because of how hard she’s been pushing it. I for sure was taking it easy. I did do a lot of housework, but it was all at a pretty gentle pace, and felt like recovery because the work week strains my mind, not my body, so picking up toys etc, feels quite nice to me on a Saturday and a great mental break.

Around 4:00 I played Zingo with Mary. She has been progressing down her hundred chart for eye exercises, and one of the rewards she requested was a daddy day. I said I wouldn’t do a fully daddy day, but I’d love to have a daddy hour with her. The plan was to play Zing, get a treat together and maybe (if time) build a boat together for Lydia’s Olympics.

Around 4:30 or 5:00 we ran family errands. We returned some things to the gap. Lily went into Trader Joe’s, and I got some sprinkler parts from Lowe’s. While Lily was in Trader Joe’s I played a game with the three kids (Lydia was at home with Georgia) in which we threw the ball to each other, and whoever caught it had to say a yummy thing they liked. Ammon and Clarissa were beside themselves with laughter as they said yucky things (like dog poop) instead of yummy things and I reacted dramatically. Then Mary and I went to ColdStone. ColdStone shared space with Cinnabun, and Mary said that is what she wanted. It was a perfect choice for a rainy day, so we got Cinnabuns for the family.

At home we all had dinner, and then ate our Cinnabun. Here is a video of Clarissa with her’s.

After dinner, I watched the next Dark Crystal with the kids. It was sooooooo good. After putting the babies to sleep, I met Mary in the basement for the final portion of our daddy daughter time.

It was so sweet! When I went to the basement, Mary was all ready for me with her cat blanket laid down and materials all prepared for our project. We worked happily together. I made a boat, and she made a creature. We decided to make her creature the driver of my boat. It was another moment of pure bliss today. I.Love.My.Family.

Friday was incredibly busy for me at work. I also had a team breakfast with my team in the morning outside at Kneaders which was very fun. The team misses being together, so we are doing a team meal once per week to help with that.

After work we had dinner and Lily made one of my favorite meals she has ever made. She rolled up sliced zucchini, and baked it in a tomato sauce that had mint in it. I devoured it. It was so good!!!!!

After dinner, we watched the first half of the recently made Harriet Tubman video as a family.

Today was a heavy day, but also very good. I was in meetings by 7:30, and Lily was super busy today too. Not only was she doing all the routines with the children and keeping the house clean, but she also built out a schedule for Ammon and Clarissa to help them use their time more constructively.

Lily really has the home operating in amazing order. The older girls have really taken the Family Carnival to heart. To earn money, they recreated the Mona Lisa. I think they did a great job on Mary’s smile!

I had my pipeline reviews today. The forecast is relatively stable, but still quite shy of quota (not the best, but about in line with what other NorthEast teams are doing).

I had 10 meetings almost completely back to back, and then I had my meeting with my therapist Mary Lou and then my bike work out (which I loved!)

Mary Lou is retiring. I will always remember her as one of the guides who helped guide me through a time of life that involved intense change. Literally the changing of the old wine skins to the new wine skins for the new life God wanted to pour into me. It was a painful and traumatic process at times, but she has helped me to learn to approach life with more mindfulness, acceptance, self-compassion and gentleness. More than anything, she has helped me to believe in myself, and in my own ability to get through life in a positive way. I love Mary Lou.

After work, we all enjoyed spaghetti, and then all the girls and I played in the sandbox and on the trampoline (I did a lot of watching too) until 8:30 when we put everyone to bed. Ammon didn’t want to get dirty so he stayed inside. Lily read to him, explained his new schedule to him and put him to bed.

Speaking of Ammon, here is a funny anecdote of something that happened today. After the anatomy lesson from yesterday, we put the skeleton model way high in his closet (8 feet or so) so that he wouldn’t play with it. This morning when Lily walked into Ammon’s room, Ammon tried to hide it, but Lily found that he had the toy skeleton. Lily said, “Ammon, how did you get that toy skeleton.” Ammon responded, “uh…..it fell.” Lily said, “Ammon, I know you got it, so can you tell me how you got it?” Ammon said, “I forgot.” Lily said, “Ammon, I will forgive you if you tell me the truth. I know you know what happened.” At that point, Ammon told her that that he climbed up the shelving to get to the skeleton. Lily and I gave Ammon positive reinforcement and praise for telling the truth. He just wants to please people so badly and we are trying to help him understand that telling the truth is what pleases us the most. Still, Lily and I got a good laugh at his efforts to please us by hiding his conduct.

Today was a good day, although my sinus infection came back in full force. I had a bunch of meeting until about 4:00 and then told myself I’d just rest on the bed for a bit and then woke up 45 minutes later. Still, I think my body needed the rest. At that point, I decided not to re-engage in work (I paid for it by working 2 hours tonight after the kids went down), but it was fun to be with the family earlier in the day than normal.

First I helped to a assemble a new Paw Patrol ridable car for Clarissa and Ammon. Then I played a little bit in the sandbox with Ammon and Clarissa and did a Facetime with my dad and Suzanne. While on the phone with them, it was decided that they will join us for the Olympics that Lydia is hosting. Lydia has been using a lot of her earned money to order things for the Olympics she is organizing. Straps for three-legged races. Burlap sacks for sack races. Medals for the winners. Little hurdles for hurdle races etc. Lydia has been so excited about these family Olympics and she flipped out with joy at the idea of my dad and Suzanne joining the fun. We will need to make that happen! It was so fun to talk to them!

After the call, we gathered the family and Lily gave an anatomy lesson using the books and anatomy figures she acquired for our family. We learned about such cool things! Like the surface area of the small intestines is as big as a tennis court, and the liver helps regulate body temperature, and blood contents, and that the stomach has a strong acid that could remove paint, and that it takes 32 hours for food to come out the other end. I was enthralled. Ammon and Clarissa were mostly distracted (see video), but everyone else really got something out of it. It was a major highlight today.

During the lesson, Clarissa got a nose bleed. She is so cute even when she is having a nose bleed!

Also during the lesson, I caught Clarissa balancing on the sink ledge with nothing but her stomach muscles so that she could play with the water and fill up a cup. My first instinct was to grab her and get her off so she didn’t fall. My second instinct was less responsible, but it was also the reason why we now have this video 🙂. I was amazed that she could do that and even gracefully lower herself down at the end.

Also after the lesson, Ammon gave us a puppet show, and then Clarissa gave her own super short puppet show.

After the lesson, we all walked as a family around the block. I started with Ammon and Mary. Later, Lily started with Clarissa and Lydia and walked the separate direction around the block that we did so that we could meet up. When Clarissa saw me, she ran to me and gave me a big hug. I could watch this video all day and just bask in the warm happy feelings it gives me.

After the walk, the babies went to bed and I did Mary’s eye exercises while Lily went on a walk with Lydia. I took two weeks off or so of Mary’s eye exercises and I recently noticed her left eye not aligning well and that scared me back into strict consistency again. I really want that girl’s vision to be as good as possible.

Then I had dinner, caught up at work and blogged.

I loved this day :).

Lily and I both had good days today, but by the end of the day, we were both completely spent. It’s back to reality where I have a grueling work schedule, and Lily is in high-power parenting mode until she fades from exertion at the end of the day. It’s nice to know though, that while Lily and I are busy adulting, our children still get to be children. Today, Lydia’s medieval dress came in the mail. She earned it as a grab bag through Lily’s Summer Carnival system. Lydia wore it all day today, and absolutely loved it. Doesn’t she look great?

My work day actually wasn’t too bad because I paced myself and I had a couple of meetings cancel, but the day (including my big morning run) was still enough to cause me to feel very spent at the end of the day.

Lily spent tons of time with the kids, helping Lydia on the harp, reading to kids, playing with kids, attending to kids, cleaning and lots and lots of cooking. Dinner was AMAZING.

After dinner Lily and I hung some pictures in Ammon’s room. We both felt very stressed from the day once everyone finally went to sleep and it was nice to walk off the steam together on this beautiful Summer night.