Month: March 2021

I went to puppy obedience school with Mary and Basil tonight. It was agility work. It was soooooo cute. Here are videos.

Basil did great getting over the blue bar.

Basil did not do so great getting on the trampoline. He never did get on. But in this video you can see his friend Roxy, a St. Berdoodle that looks just like a bigger version of himself.

At first, Basil was quite hesitant with the A-frame.

But after some diligent work (Mary was a super trainer!), Basil had no hesitancy going up and over it:

Also, at first he would not go through the tunnel, but someone gave us the great idea to make the tunnel shorter until he got the hang of it. That idea got him to go through slowly and hesitantly one time. But after he realized he could do it, he quickly started running through it.

He also did some leg coordination work:

We weren’t able to get him to go on the platform along the wall.

I had so much fun with Mary at this class, and Basil is such a joy!

Even though I saw Lily bring home the St. Patrick’s Day groceries last night, and I wrote a note (as though I was a Leprechaun), I totally forgot it was St. Patrick’s Day this morning. The rest of the family didn’t forget though! When I made my way upstairs, everyone was already enjoying the St. Patrick’s Day goodies and everyone was wearing green (which I forgot to do)!

Also, Lily read St. Patrick’s Day books to everyone:

Target was completely sold out of Lucky Charms and we also didn’t get any chocolate gold coins like we usually do, so Lily asked if I could write a note to explain why we had other goodies instead. This was my best attempt.

As usual, there was evidence of Leprechauns using our bathroom.

When I came up from a very intense day at work at 4:30, I was delighted to find Georgia visiting and Lily letting the kids help her cook and prepare the St. Patrick’s Day feast we planned to have for dinner. I think they are making a delicious bread loaf in this picture.

Lily also let everyone help make a rainbow skittles cake. Here is a video of them frosting:

The dinner was so delicious that I had to take a picture of my plate. Cabbage, roasted carrots, grapes, cheese, home-made bread (soda bread?), home-made mashed potatoes, and the show-stopper was the corn-beef, probably the best I’ve had in my life.

Lily, thank you thank you thank you for making this such an incredible St. Patrick’s day for everyone!!!

After the drama and difficulty of yesterday, it was so wonderful to have a day of pure family fun today.

Church was in the morning. As usual it was amazing, and I had a chance to participate by lighting the Lent candles and reading a script they provided for me. The messages were wonderful except for one part of our Pastor’s sermon when she told a personal story that had racist elements. Lily did an awesome job of interrupting racism by writing our Pastor a sweet and thoughtful note pointing it out. We know our Pastor well enough to know that nothing was intended, that she will be grateful for the correction, and will probably make a statement to our congregation just to apologize. We are all learning and there is not no shame or embarrassment for anyone to make a mistake and learn from it in a safe environment, even our Pastor. That is the culture that we love soooooo much at our new church. I’m also super grateful for Lily’s voice. I felt a little uncomfortable during that part of the sermon, but I couldn’t articulate very well what exactly was wrong. Lily knew exactly what to say and I loved her loving email sharing our concern.

After church, we all loaded in the car, and everyone hung out in the car and also watched as Mary and I continued working on her bike-riding. I was so amazed! She did it! She learned it!!!! She’s biking now!!! After 3-5 tries, she was able to ride down the entire parking lot of Mountain View Highschool. Then we started working on turns as I told her to lean in the direction she wanted to turn. After 10 or so tries she got really good at gradual turning. I thought we had made amazing progress for one day, and was satisfied with that, but Mary really wanted to learn how to start on her own. She kept trying and trying and trying, until she started on her own once. Then twice. Then 3, 4, it must have been 5 or more times she started on her own before it was time to go. Mary!!! You can start. You can go straight. You can turn in both directions. You’ve got it!! You know how to bike!!!!!! Next week will be Ammon. Congratulations Mary!!!!

Then we went straight to Suzanne’s 60th birthday party. It was a very well planned and coordinated surprise party. Suzanne thought she was meeting MaryLou at the family home to go through items in the home that needed to be sorted and dealt with. But when she arrived, the plan was that MaryLou would lead her to the backyard where Suzanne would be shocked to see family members there for her birthday. That plan mostly worked except I guess we didn’t properly debrief Ammon because he was running all around the backyard, and didn’t come when we called, and so while he was running around the backyard, he saw Suzanne and then started yelling for her….haha….it was cute in the end. Yes, Suzanne was surprise to see Ammon (and confused because she thought it might be MaryLou’s grandson Aiden, but he was too short to be Aiden) and then she came and saw the rest of the family.

We had a wonderful time talking. The food was delicious as was the pie, German chocolate and icecream we had for desert. Also it was so so fun to talk to everyone.

It was also so adorable to watch Basil play with Walter and Willow. Here are some pictures and videos.

It seemed like everyone had a really great time. We love Suzanne so much. She is such a wonderful part of our lives, and our children absolutely adore her. We hope she has an amazing birthday tomorrow (her real birthday!)

Mary napped on the way home next to Basil. It was so cute!!

At home we did Karaoke. We’ve been listening to a lot of Alicia Keys in our home and Lydia has been practicing singing Alicia’s song, “Rise-up” and has been really looking forward to Karaoke. Tonight we made it happen!

Lately, I have felt overwhelmed and today was a very busy day. In the morning, I was exhausted, and Lily got up to take care of the dog and the kids for the first hour or two of the day. I felt so so so grateful for that time and I know it was a sacrifice for her as she is equally beat by the weekend. Once I got rolling for the day, Lily left to Basil’s socialization class and then ran some errands while I stayed home with the kids and mostly cleaned.

When Lily got home, we had lunch, and then I took Mary to the church parking lot to practice riding her bike. On Thursday, I ordered palm, knee and elbow pads for her, and I was so grateful Amazon got them to me in time. I wanted Mary to have everything she needed to succeed. She was such a good sport. It was a little chilly, but she really put her heart into learning. At one point her gloves got soaked from ground which was wet from the morning rain, and then she did the rest without gloves. She kept trying and trying until at the end, her fingers were quite cold.

She really started to make great practice when I started giving her the right instructions! I should have watched a quick You-Tube video or read something, but I didn’t. I kept telling her that when she starts falling, to turn in the opposite direction to correct herself. When she was struggling, I finally hopped on her bike and learned that you need to turn in the direction you are falling to keep your balance. Once I corrected my advice, she really started to have some success. By the end of our time together, she could stay on her bike for about 10 seconds and mostly ride in a circle, but she couldn’t go in a straight line yet. Still, she was learning to balance on her own, and it was by far the best she’s ever done, and I was thrilled. It was huge progress!!! Then Mary and I picked up some books for the library and went home.

At home, I prepared the title and bill of sale documents to sell the Corolla to Diana, one of Georgia’s friends. When they came over, I finished up the paperwork with her and her friend, told them about the car, removed the license plate (the other one was stuck on and they said they would bring it back), and I was wrapping up when Ammon frantically opened the garage door and said, “Dad, hurry quick, it’s an emergency!!!” I said, “What’s going on?” Amman said, “Mom is throwing away all of our toys!!!!”

I went inside to find a war zone. It started when Lily went to clean the upstairs and was absolutely distraught at how messy it was. She cleans the house over and over and over again to the point of exhaustion and complete demoralization and begs and begs and begs the kids to clean (especially the older ones who can be expected to) and recently, she has been threatening to throw away toys if the girls’ room isn’t picked up by 7:30 PM.

Tonight, when she saw the mess, she got very frustrated, grabbed a bag, and started throwing many many things on the floor in the bag. When the girls saw that, they vehemently protested, and a very difficult battle ensued. It was shortly after that moment that I entered the home. Unfortunately, I was kindof like a deer in the headlights, being completely emotionally unprepared for what I had just walked into. I didn’t really know what to think, and I wish I would have been more supportive to Lily in the moment. I was just kind of there, trying to be comforting to all parties where I could.

Ammon was racing around the house trying to save a toy from a bag here and there and also energetically cleaning his own room (until it was spotless). He was earnestly suggesting to the older girls that the solution to their problem was to lock their bedroom door. Something to the effect of, “I’ve got it, lock your door!” Lily said, he was so cute through all of it that it was the one bit of humor she found in the whole experience.

I grabbed a bag, and helped the girls finish cleaning the upstairs, listening to them recount their pains to me until the end. In the end, we we told them we’d give back the stuffed animals if their room is perfectly clean for a month straight, or three weeks straight including the computer area. That seems like a nice meeting in the middle of consequences, and some compassion.

It was incredibly reassuring to Lily and also very instructive to me to hear David and Olivia talk the next day (at Suzanne’s party) about a podcast they heard about parenting best practices for helping kids learn to pick up their toys. The parenting expert recommended making real consequences, such as throwing away toys, when kids do not clean. That affirmed that Lily really made the right call by making a real consequences as it has been such a struggle to get the girls to pick up.

The evening was quite intense, but on a lighter note, Ammon is getting incredibly good at coloring and here is a picture he drew.

Life has been very busy lately. Lily and I have been wanting to sell our old Corolla, but we have been so busy, that it has been hard to find a chance to do it. We were thrilled to learn that Georgia’s friend Diana wanted it for her son and we were happy to provide a great price for a friend. When Diana and her son came over, he turned the ignition, and the car wouldn’t start!! The battery was dead! It died months ago because a kid left a light on in the car, but I jump started it and drove it a ton to recharge it so I thought that would solve it. “No problem” I thought, “I’ll just jump start it. Maybe the kids left another light on or something, or maybe it just needs a new battery.” I grabbed my phone to read the tutorial on jump-starting cars so I could be super accurate about not messing anything up. I fold the step-by-step instructions.

There was only one problem. Even though the Corolla had a red cap over the red bolt, the cap was mostly off and very dirty, so I didn’t notice it. But the black bolt had a red felt ring at the bottom of it that made me think it was the red bolt. So I connected the clamps accordingly and sparks shot out. Then the car was really dead. We told them we’d figure it out and if they were still interested, they could come back when everything was working.

Thank goodness Moroni was on his way over to work on remodeling our basement. He helped us so much. He should us that my little mistake (which he said has happened to him too) blew out several fuses. So now I’ll go to autozone tomorrow to get fuzes and we will go from there.

How embarrasing! I’m also so grateful for Moroni. He said he’d do it all for free, but it turned out to be much more of a project than he bargained for. Lily and I are already brainstorming nice gifts for him to say thank-you.

In the evening, Lily took Mary to Basil’s dog training class. At home, I made bird’s nest cookies with the children and talked briefly about the rebirth significance of Easter, and eggs.

The look on everyone’s face is to express their dissatisfaction with needing to wait until tomorrow to eat the cookies before they were still drying.

Also, here are some pictures from scenes around the home today:

Lastly, here is a cute video from Clarissa earlier in the day. I chuckle because I memories or at least one memory of Mary reading a book upside-down, probably when she was Clarissa’s age.

Today it was my turn to meet with our wonderful psychologist, Vhari. She asked if I wanted to do sand therapy today, and I said yes. Here’s what I created as well as a little excerpt about it from my personal journal (“You” refers to God”)

“The sand exercise with Vhari was pretty interesting. She asked what I would call it, and I said, “a happy life, a busy life”. Here is the image. I looked for something that could represent You, but I didn’t find anything, so I didn’t include you. I felt a little concerned about that. I was happy and surprised to see how much nature I included. These trips into Your beautiful scenery have meant more to my soul than I have realized. The ATM represented job pressures (this quarter is so stressful with my new team that is billing very little this quarter), and also represents money pressures etc. I included the toilet because I recently unclogged a toilet and it also represented other dad stuff I do like cleaning pencil marks off of walls etc. You’ll notice us as family all pointed in towards each other, closely. The bed represents mine and Lily’s intimacy. There are musical instruments. The car was included because we are in the process of selling a car (today I mixed up the charging cables when I was jumping the Carolla and blew out multiple fuses that now need to be fixed.)”

It is a very happy and a very busy life. Later in the day, I came upstairs to take a mental break from work. Clarissa also seemed very tired. I put her on my lap and we both fell asleep until we felt rested. It was a very sweet experience to sleep with her cuddled up with me.

Today was Lydia’s 10th Birthday. It is so cool that her birthday is on International Women’s Day! Starting last year, I’ve invited Lydia to pick a value she wants me to document so she can be thoughtful about the values she wants to hold onto as she grows up. Last year she chose determination (shown through her dedication to reading and the reading competition, sticking with harp and several other things). This year she chose fun. What a great value!!

In the morning, I took some extra time from work to help with breakfast. Lily ran to the store for ingredients and together we made a yummy waffle, fruit and whipped cream breakfast for our sweet Lydia.

While Lydia was at school, I worked and at some point in the day, Lily ran an errand for Georgia. While running her errand she saw a very long line at Gunny’s that was concerning.

I was having a stressful workday, and in a irritable mood, but at one point I stopped to write in each page of a “50 reasons why I love you” book for Lydia, and that made me really happy and really changed my mood. Lily did the same thing and also enjoyed it.

I also had a visit from some very cute wizards with their wands. I thought they were adorable!

Also, while Lydia was at school, Clarissa helped Lily make Shepard’s pie, Lydia’s special birthday meal. Here is an adorable video of Clarissa kurplunking the vegetables into the pot.

Around 2:30, Lily took the kids to start Lydia’s cupcake party. I raced to get my work done, and showed up a little after halfway through. It was so fun!

Then it was time for me to take Lydia and Mary skiing. We had a bit of a rough moment when Lydia freaked out because I brought the wrong snow-pants (size 6), and I corrected her very sharply for her behavior, although I did feel bad about her having to wear snowpants that were so small. At the end of the day, her feet did get cold, but as I will detail, we all ended up having a wonderful wonderful time.

I got myself a night skiing pass today so I could be up on the mountain with Lydia and Mary. I didn’t want to interfere much during their lesson, so I just skied my own rounds and tried to stick around them and say hi and take pictures when I could. Here are some videos and pictures.

It was so fun watching the girls ski in their class and I was blown away by how well they were doing. Lydia told me that her instructor let her lead the entire class down the mountain. Even with how good they were doing, I still felt nervous about skiing with them. Would we be able to get off the ski lift ok together? What if they struggled on the mountain, and I’m not a trained instructor to help them? When their class was over, I asked if they wanted to ski more, and they gave a resounding yes! In fact, we went down the mountain three times from the first ski-lift stop. We needed a little help from the staff to get on the ski-lift chair, but they helped us, and getting off was way easier than I expected. The girls skied so well, and I had so much fun with them. Lydia kept pushing for more and more speed, and loved asking me over and about how fast she was going. Mary kept right up and we had a ball. I have to give a lot of credit to Lily who really spoke up about making sure we got the girls in ski lessons this year. It has turned out to be such an incredible thing, and such an amazing thing to do with the girls on Lydia’s birthday!

It was so nice to come home to incredible Shepherds pie and cupcakes from the party earlier. Lydia opened some presents, but not all because Clarissa fell asleep and we wanted her to be a part of it, so she opened the rest in the morning the next day over breakfast. Lydia did read the love book Lily and I wrote in for her, and gave me the most intentional and sincere thank you. She said something to the effect of, “dad, thank you for this. Really, Thank You.” I could tell she was touched in a similar way that I was touched when she gave me a love book like that for Christmas. I completely borrowed her brilliant idea.

Here is a video of us over dinner while Lydia read her love book, I recounted how I made up for the wedgie I gave Lydia by bringing the wrong snowpants, by buying her an edgie wedgie so we could ski together.

All in all it was such a fun day for all. I love my Lydia so much. She is kind, thoughtful, sensitive, honest, talented, brilliant, happy, caring, obsessed with animals, loves her siblings, responsible, beautiful, funny, fun, creative, great with crafts, musical, so so knowledgeable (always reading and researching), talented at baking, introspective, humble and sincere. She is the perfect oldest sister for our family. We love you so so so much Lydia!

Today we drove home while listening to songs from John Denver. It was so fitting given his love of nature that permeates his music. Then we listened to incredible book from Bill Gates about climate change. I am blown away by Bill Gates’ optimism, knowledge, philanthropy, and daily focus on saving our world. He is truly an inspiration. Here is a video Lydia took of herself in the car.

At home we picked up Basil and bathed the kids. Then my dad and Suzanne came over. We had a wonderful time visiting and they gave gifts to Lydia for her birthday.

They gave Lydia a very cute bird stuffed-animal (Lydia loves stuffed animals!) and a bracelet making kit that seems to be crochet with little rubber bands. Weather was gorgeous and a great time was had by all.

Then I blogged, Lily rested and the kids watched tv, and then we all had dinner. Lydia worked on her bracelet kit, and at first got really frustrated because she struggled to figure it out even with Lily helping. Eventually, Lydia tried an easier pattern, and did figured it out, and gave the bracelet to Mary, who was very excited about it. Great perserverance Lydia, and thank you for the gifts dad and Suzanne!

We had sushi for dinner, I finished blogging and Lily watched the Meghan Markle interview that just came out today. Now it’s time to get ready for another week!

Last night, we pulled into our Kanab Airbnb just as Lydia, Lily and I finished listening to the incredible audio-book Redwall (the rest of the family was asleep).

About a week ago, Lydia said she would like to go to Pink Coral Sand Dunes for the weekend before her birthday. Lily got our Airbnb, and scheduled time for Lydia and me to volunteer at the Best Friends Animal Sanctuary. Due to Covid, tours need to be booked months in advance, and there was only one volunteer slot available for a child and adult, and Lily has allergies to cats, so I was the lucky one that got to go with Lydia.

The day started with a breakfast at a yummy bakery and a stop at the Best Friends Visistor’s Center in Kanab. We met a very nice man who worked there named Mike who had a Basset Beagle and told us all about the sanctuary. They had two cats at the visitor’s center in a room that you could go into in order to play with them. We mostly supervised the kids, but I guess Clarissa slipped in there unattended at some point and was a little too forward with a cat because she came out with a decently sized scratch on her face. She didn’t seem at all phased by it, it was actually pretty funny.

We then went to Coral Pink Sand Dunes. I was blown away by the scenery. I felt like I was transplanted to the Sahara desert temporarily.

All the kids and I took our shoes off, and it was so fun to walk all over the soft sand. Climbing up and down the hills was so fun, but also super exhausting.

Our sleds barely worked in the sand, even on the steepest hills. The rented sleds that had a harder bottom (and went really fast) at the entrance, but we didn’t realize we should have gotten a couple of those until we were deep into the sand dunes. A group of people let me try their firm sled a couple of times, and I got going fast. It was really fun! The kids seemed happy enough with our super-slow sleds. I’m grateful they were still able to have such a fun time!

I hiked with Ammon, Clarissa and Lily to the top of the tallest dune while the older girls played a little bit down from us. It was soooo windy up there. Ammon and Clarissa both got really sad.

In this video, you can hear the crazy blustering wind and Ammon crying. Lily promptly took Ammon down at that point.

I turned Clarissa around to protect her eyes and went down one of the biggest slopes just one time with her. It was so slow, we stopped 2/3 the way down.

We all congregated in a less windy area and everyone played in the sand for another 20 minutes or so.

At one point Clarissa got very sad and said she wanted to go in the car. It was good timing since we were just about wrapping up anyway.

After the sand dunes, Lily dropped off me and Lydia at the animal sanctuary. Best Friends Animal Sanctuary is incredible. During non-covid times they have 1,600 animals, mostly cats and dogs, but also pigs, horses, birds etc. They have fostered out a lot of animals temporarily due to their reduced staff during Covid so right now they have about 1,000 animals. It was incredibly peaceful there. While I was with Lydia, Lily spent time with the kids at their pet cemetery, which had the most beautiful wind-chime sounds. Lily said it was an incredible and spiritual experience. I felt the same about my time with Lydia. Here are pictures of Lily’s time with the kids in the cemetery. I got to drive by it as well and capture this video with wind-chimes in the background.

First of all, the sanctuary is spread across miles of property located right in the most beautiful southern-Utah scenery, and the scenery alone is inspiring. But I was also incredibly touched by how this facility cares for animals with disabilities. What this shelter specializes in are animals with medical conditions. Where Lydia and I volunteered, there was a blind cat, a cat with cerebral palsy type challenges, so it could only walk a foot or so at a time, a lot of cats that needed medication, a cat that had its legs broken, but now uses them the best she can etc. I realized that in the very American philosophy of efficiency, it would be easy to think that these cats should all just be put down because they are a drain on society. and no longer have their value. But I was so touched to learn that this is a no kill facility that cares for these animals very well until they die naturally. This care includes medications, stroller walks, clean facilities, good food etc etc. They told me they built a special path for stroller-walking the cats so they wouldn’t get scared by cars passing on the road. I pondered as I served with Lydia that perhaps nothing has inherent value. Perhaps value is only gained by someone bestowing value by love and care. And these cats had great value because of the way they are cared for. And we can create value/worth in people and animals, and ourselves, as we take better care of all. Someone/something’s value/worth is not determined by its utility, but rather by how it is valued by others. As we choose to care and value, the things we care about and value become valuable. I was just blown away by the choice this organization has made to love, care and value these animals against any “practical” argument that these animals no longer served a purpose. The example of this organizations love is not only extremely valuable, instructive and purposeful to me and the rest of the world, but it obviously changed the lives of these animals and in many cases gave them much more of life. It reminded me of a recent church lesson from the Community of Christ in which the speaker discussed a Buddhist church he attended and heard someone share her remorse over catching a mosquito on a fly strip, and trying to remove it, but accidentally killing it in the process. The speaker I listened to suggested that if we cannot feel remorse over killing a mosquito, perhaps there is something in our hearts preventing us from loving other people fully as well.

Now for the blow-by blow with Lydia. I had such a great time with her!

Our first task was to clean cat room #1.

This involved poop scooping, peed on litter scooping, scraping dried poop off the floor, sweeping, mopping, wiping surfaces, refilling water etc.

Lydia was a great sport! We were almost done with the room when Lydia got a massive nose bleed. She disappeared into the bathroom, and then came out and told me she needed help cleaning up, that it was a really really bad nose-bleed. I walked in and there was blood all over the floor, the toilet, and even the wall. Lydia aptly said, “it looks like somebody died in here.” We cleaned it up together and then went back to work.

The next task we were to accomplish was taking some cats on a stroller ride and on the way to doing that, the lady helping us showed us how she feeds cat food to the wild-turkeys (see below!):

Lydia fell in love with a blind cat named Ember. Lydia was so happy that she got to take Ember on a stroller ride. I took a cat named Daniel.

Lydia and I stopped briefly at the Gazebo to rest after we did some walking. While here, I asked Lydia, “what’s one thing I could do to be a better dad?” She said, “Adopt Ember”. I said, “besides adopt Ember.” She said, “Adopt Ember.” I was firm about not adopting Ember, but I love how Lydia loves her, and I also loved Lydia’s persuasive argument about how she was just fine, even without her eyesight.

After the walk, Lydia and I went back to the complex we served in to return the cats. Lydia spent some more time with Ember and I got some pictures. You will also see below a picture of the cat with Cerebral Palsy-type challenges, who we watched work so hard to walk even a couple of feet (he’s by the door entrance two photos down.)

I had a really really good time with Lydia and I kept telling her how great I thought it was for her to do service for her birthday since this trip was a birthday trip for her. She is the sweetest girl. She loves animals, and she is a delight to spend time with, especially one on one, when I get to really focus on how wonderful she is. She was so pleasant, mature, intelligent, and so loving to the animals and I thoroughly enjoyed my time with that sweet girl.

Then we ordered food from the Peekaboo Cafe and Lily and I agreed it is some of the best food we’ve ever had. Lydia had some cheesecake that is arguably the best cheesecake I’ve had in my life (I had a bite). We are falling in love with Kanab, and this restaurant is our new goto. It’s amazing. My face looks ridiculous below because I’m not sitting on a stool, I’m squatting trying to fit in and it is quite uncomfortable!

I then read books, and a blog from Community of Christ to everyone, said a night prayer and tucked in the two youngest kids.

I then had so much fun playing bannanagrams and Nuts about Mutts with Lydia and Mary. Lily was exhausted and went to bed early. I was good to go, because I passed out on the couch and had a one hour nap before dinner.

I then tucked in Lydia and Mary. They were so cute with their stuffed animals!

With everyone asleep, and me still having some energy, I spent a solid half-hour in quiet reflection and prayers. It’s hard to find moments like that and I felt very grateful for the time with God and myself.

Today the kids tried to get Basil to face his fear of the trampoline and walk on it. Lydia assures me they had no intention of jumping with him on it, which could hurt him.