Author: lilydarais

Today Grace, the babysitter, came to her afternoon shift dressed as a cow. She excitedly explained that today was dress-like-a-cow day at Chic Fil A, and that if you dress as a cow you get a free meal. She spent the rest of the afternoon helping the girls assemble cow costumes.

Abe came home SO excited about this. He made his cow costume out of black duck tape that he cut into cow spots. Ammon LOVED wearing his cow costume and spent the whole time in it moo-ing at everyone.

I should have made everyone turn around because I crocheted Lydia’s tail, knit Abe’s tail, and made a giant tassel for Mary’s tail. All of these tails, upon close inspection, were rather scraggly and clearly not well done, but I was SO proud of myself for making them. First of all, a week from last Saturday I did not even know how to crochet, and I just re-taught myself how to knit after a twelve year hiatus TODAY.

My dream of mastering the world of handicrafts is still out of reach. I have absolutely no talent for these arts…but I do have loads of enthusiasm! Maybe that plus practice will yield, if not mastery, then at least some level of competence in this lifetime. I am so, so grateful for this time I get to practice these skils.

Also, the girls were absolutely out of control with Grace today. It was sheer pain to hear them interact with each other and her. I gave into temptation and yelled at them from my chair a couple of times, and I was at my wits’ end by the time Grace went home. They lost their privileges for a week after today. Sometimes–a lot of times–I feel like I must have missed something in the parenting department because the behavior of my kids equals massive-mom-failure.

On the other hand, they played beautifully together while Grace was gone. I sat by the window and listened to them cooperate, giggle, and play for several hours beneath my window. They did make huge messes which they did not clean up, but there was at least one point during the day where they were not absolute terrors. I just wish they could be terrors just for me and spare their wonderful babysitters.

This morning my mom took the kids to their morning swim lesson, and they are making progress! I am really, really, REALLY hoping this summer they learn to swim.

While they were at swim lessons, I found this on Lydia’s bed:

She had tucked Puss in before she left for swimming. It warmed my heart to see evidence of her sweet childhood tenderness. On Sunday my heart broke for her when I discovered her sobbing quietly on the floor because I had taken away her privileges unjustly. It was a big misunderstanding, but we cuddled, I read her a personalized book my grandma had made about her, and we cuddled until she felt better. I hope she always knows she is treasured and loved. I spend way too much time correcting her ALL the time, so I am going to try to be better about that.

During Ammon’s nap the babysitters leave for two and a half hours. Today the girls and I spent the whole time together. We listened to Charlotte’s Web while Lydia cross stitched and Mary…watched me do her crafts. I made her two pom-poms, one of which she is displaying below.

I also crocheted two flowers for the girls. Lydia made hers into a ring.

And here’s my new reading pile! I read the Terry Tempest Williams book in the morning and spent the rest of the day squinting at everything.

Finally, Abe had a really hard day at work. One of his deals had a complication that made his life very difficult, and then he came home, made dinner for everyone, got everyone ready for bed, and cleaned Mary’s poop. That’s right. Mary, almost age five, pooped in her pants, and Abe had to clean her up. (My mom helped clean the bathroom that had poo all over it.)

After FHE, Abe told me the idea of African adoption is sounding better and better. I think he might be tired of having me on bedrest too.

Last night Abe and I were up until 1am sitting on our porch in the cool night air talking. The air was silky and cool, and I could smell the petunias by the porch while we chatted. We love how peaceful our cul-de-sac is.

This morning our kids disappointed us by waking up early, even though they went to bed late. That meant we had lots of time for pre-church grooming. I question the holiness of these activities, but I do get to bond with the kids while I do their nails and hair.

While Abe went to a meeting, I watched the kids in Ammon’s room. They were so clean and played so nicely together that I just had to take a picture. In moments like the ones below, I remember how lucky I am to have such fabulous children.

After naps, Lydia learned how to cross-stitch. One of my daydreams is to sew/embroider/knit/crochet/WHATEVER with my kids while we all listen peacefully to audiobooks and music. To this end, I have been trying to teach them various handicrafts. Cross-stitching seems to be the best so far for the girls.

In the evening, Abe colored with the girls. These are their creations. Abe contributed a LOT. “Mary’s” picture of the bed was created 100% by Abe while Mary played next to him.

Also, an inventory of sorts for this week of bedrest.

These are some of the books I read. I had to return Code Name Verity and Gilead before taking this picture, and since taking it I have read Black Like Me and finished Joseph Smith: Rough Stone Rolling.  That last one took me SIX AND A HALF YEARS to read. I am so exuberant to have finally finished it! (Now onto the Joseph Smith polygamy tomes…)
I also taught myself to crochet and made these two baby blankets. I am stricken with horror at the thought that any baby would unravel them and kill themselves with the yarn, so I am trying to figure out how to make the ends EXTRA EXTRA secure before I give them away.

I have also watched a million how-to YouTube videos on bento box lunches, crochet patterns, sewing patterns, felt balls, and twine how-to’s. I also have researched how to adopt children from Africa because I can not imagine undergoing pregnancy ever again.

This morning we got to spend with Liem and Phuong before they had to go to the airport to catch their flight. Abe made his signature Saturday breakfast: waffles, mixed berry compote, and veggie omelettes.

Before Liem and Phuong left, they gifted us their bear spray, which thankfully they did not have to use. Abe immediately had use for it! Not for a bear, of course, but to take hiking with the kids in case they ran into a bear, or mountain lion, or whatever. This bear spray must have good vibes, because Abe didn’t have to use it either.

Then Abe came home, fed the kids, put Ammon down for a nap (which he refused to take) and took a nap himself. The girls spent the afternoon playing outside with the neighbors.

As I blog, they are all out on errands. And I will get back to the glorious tasks for bedrest: reading, crocheting, and looking up YouTube tutorials.

On Friday morning my mom dropped me off near the nail store at the mall, and the babysitter took the kids to the mall play place while my mom and I got matching pedicures. I can’t reach my toes, and since I sit here staring at them all day, I really enjoyed getting them done.

In the evening Liem and Phuong came to stay with us for a night. We had a great time visiting, and they brought us beautiful flowers they had picked in the Tetons earlier that morning. I stole some pictures of their hike from Phuong’s phone to post on the blog.

Also, Friday was my dear brother’s birthday!!! I can’t believe he’s thirty-two. And next week they find out the gender of their baby…I can’t wait!!

I also have pictures from earlier in the week that I am going to put here because I forget which days they match.

Thursday was Nana’s birthday!! It seemed so appropriate that the night before her birthday, my mom let Mary have a “sleepover” on her bedroom floor. She is so kind, compassionate, and loving. When Abe and I are at our wits’ end (especially with Mary these days), my mom works magic, calms Mary down, and gives in to her craziest whims.

My mom is the unsung hero of the house. She is constantly serving everyone. She tidies, cleans, bandages ALL of the kids’ boo-boos, never loses her patience, waits on the kids non-stop, plays with Ammon, and provides a sanctuary for the girls, especially when they are bored, sad, or hurt. They know they can always go to her room and do fun activities, talk–and be listened to!!–, get stickers, read kids’ magazines, and play games.

When Mary is sad, she always cries for Nana. And Nana is the only one who can calm her down. Ammon called my mom “Mama” up until a couple weeks ago, and Lydia adores Nana, as evidenced in the pictures at the bottom of this post.

Sometimes people ask Abe if it is hard to live with his mother-in-law. He always responds that if they knew his mother-in-law, they would know it isn’t hard at all. If it weren’t for the kids’ tantrums and my yelling at the kids in response to their tantrums, we would have a perfectly peaceful, harmonious house.

In addition to doing all of that for us, my mom also works every day on her family history, goes to the temple a lot, exercises regularly, reads her scriptures for hours each morning, volunteers at the family history center, and visits one of her mentally ill visiting teachees daily. She has friends innumerable who call her for comfort with their problems, and she always answers the phone and responds with love and kindness. She is currently in charge of emergency prep for our entire ward, and because she is so persistent and thorough, people are actually getting prepared. Oh, and she does all this with some pretty challenging health issues. She’s amazing.

It’s kind of hard living up to her wonderful example. In fact, I have stopped trying. I mean, my mom NEVER loses her temper, NEVER says unkind things, and NEVER is anything less than charitable and kind. It’s too far out of my league to attempt to follow in her footsteps, but I am so, so grateful she is my mom and leads the way for all of us, every day.

Mary slept through Nana’s birthday celebration. Maybe the excitement of the sleepover the night before did her in.

This morning my mom drove Lydia and me to Lydia’s harp lesson. I knew it was my only outing for the day, so I snapped a picture:

Thanks to our babysitter, Sophie, I spent the rest of the day in my chair by the window. The girls had a play date with Pippa in the afternoon, and Betsy came and sat visiting with me for a truly lovely hour. I just love her and I also love that I don’t feel any panic after visiting with her. She is just so easy going, funny, authentic (like one thousand percent authentic), and engaging. I am looking forward to our next play date, whenever that happens.

She also brought me homemade pizzelles! They were so yummy.

Abe had a great day at work, and my mom was, as usual, so helpful with everything. It’s her birthday tomorrow!!!

This 4th of July was one of my favorite of all time. In fact, it was my favorite! Every part of the day was beautiful, happy, fun, peaceful, filled with feelings of gratitude–or all of the above all at once.

I had gone to bed on the third of July feeling grumpy about how much Abe has to shoulder while I am on bed rest, but in the morning we talked about it and completely resolved my issues. He is, what can I say? The BEST. He told me this can either be a really special time in our lives that draws us closer, or it can be a hard time. We can choose. After mulling it over for a while, I decided this is going to be a special time. I am going to try to be humble and not get angry about everything that people are doing for me. I am also not going to let my personal pride debilitate me, literally, for life.

We also started off the day by letting the kids make their own flag toasts. (We helped Ammon with his.)

Then Mary crafted a cut-out of herself. She decided that her friend, Anabelle, probably wanted Mary around full-time, and so she gifted this cut-out of herself to her friend. Mary has a terrific sense of self-esteem.

Then Abe took the girls to the Freedom Festival. It is a very patriotic festival where the community recreates a Revolutionary War camp community, and historical characters tell their stories. Abe’s favorite was George Washington, who told wonderful stories about how he learned to be a better grandfather. He also loved how George Washington had no problem telling the kids they were children of God who had the power to change the world. Sometimes we stop and realize that Orem is has some really special qualities, one being that people talk about God openly at community events.

Then the kids played outside for the rest of the day.

Karin and Jay joined us for dinner. While they were helping with dinner prep, we all enjoyed Abe’s soundtrack of the best kind of American music–Hawaiian music! We then had tofurkey dogs, brats, baked beans, potato salad, watermelon, grilled pineapple, and a trifle I made in the morning.

I got to ask Karin about a crazy idea I had this afternoon. Since I’ve been busy crocheting, I have been wishing there were a way to give the blanket I’m making to a hospital somewhere and let the receiver know that they and their baby have been prayed for. Then I thought, why not start a non profit where people can donate items to prayed-for, albeit anonymous, recipients? That way the recipient can know that someone has prayed for them.

Karin told me that the process for starting such an organization is pretty simple, but the upkeep is a little bit of a headache, especially when it comes to taxes (which is her specialty). I will have to mull it over more–meaning, it will probably never happen. In the meantime, maybe I will just tuck a note into my blanket before donating it to a women’s shelter or something.

In the evening we watched fireworks. I have never lived in a place like Utah Valley before. Everyone shoots off their own fireworks, and some cul-de-sacs go in on shows together, creating spectacular presentations that rival civic displays.

Abe, my mom, and the kids joined the neighbors sitting outside and enjoyed being surrounded by shows. (I stayed mostly inside our cool house listening to Hawaiian music and crocheting the baby blanket.) There was a show going on in the middle of our cul-de-sac, a show at the beginning of our cul-de-sac, a show in several neighboring cul-de-sacs (which were completely visible), shows from behind our house, and to top it off, our musically talented  neighbors across the street stood outside with their enormous family singing Fourth of July anthems.

I have always loved how Halloween helps mingle communities in fun ways, but I think the Fourth of July in Utah Valley achieves that even better. We enjoyed celebrating our country, our community, and our freedom with such deeply good people. I also love that my kids have made treasured memories of incredibly exciting Fourths of July. I hope the fun they had remains as a treasured memory for the rest of their lives.

On Monday we spent the whole morning practicing instruments, and then I made lunch for the girls before leaving the kids to the babysitter for an hour.

After she left for her afternoon break during Ammon’s nap, I read to the girls and tried to teach them how to crochet. Then I Googled “how to teach young kids how to crochet,” and I realized that I was not alone in my feeling of frustration. The internet says not to attempt this before the kids are seven. I have since ordered French knitting spools and hope we will have a better experience with those. The internet tells me we will.

After our crochet failure, I spent the rest of the day Googling bento box lunch ideas and crochet patterns. Abby, the babysitter, took the kids outside and had a picnic with them. They played outside until Abe came home.

Abe came home and made us a delicious salmon dinner, after which the kids ran over to the neighbors’ front yard and spent the evening there. The neighbors had their 4th of July fireworks a day early and set off almost an hour’s worth of fireworks in the cul-de-sac. Abe and the kids joined them for s’mores, sparklers, and the fireworks.

Today I stayed home from church and had an incredibly peaceful morning. I read scriptures, prayed, read my Ensign, crocheted, wrote some overdue cards, and looked out of my window a lot.

Before all of that, I had a great time doing the girls’ nails and hair. I don’t know why I haven’t picked a day to do their nails every week. It saves on the pre-lesson scramble to find nail clippers and cut them short, and I generally enjoy grooming my children. (They hate it when I do their hair, but I have always, always wanted to be better at doing hair, so I enjoy the practice.)

It was fast Sunday, so the day was a little harder on Abe. He and my mom were fasting, and they had to make up for everything I couldn’t do. They fed the girls, cleaned up after the girls, changed all of Ammon’s diapers, and generally did everything that needs doing. I felt so sorry for them! I did help cut up vegetables for our curry dinner, but in light of everything else they had to do, my contribution barely deserves that term.

On the cute side, the girls decided during nap time to bring up snacks for me. They were so cute about what they brought up: A torn piece of red pepper, broken graham crackers, a smattering of dry cereal, a Hershey kiss, a miniature marshmallow, a cup of ice, and a party-favor container of pink play dough.