Lydia turned 8 on Friday!! She has turned out so beautifully. Abe and I are always talking about how well she has blossomed. Our favorite thing about Lydia is her heart. She has a kind and honest heart, and she lives from a space of remarkable integrity. In her whole life, I have never known her to lie to me. Ever. And she is so forgiving, so affectionate, and so sweet to her flawed and often irritable mom. I love her so much.
She is also such a hard worker, not to mention so smart! She has worked SO hard at reading, to the point where she went from being the worst reader in her class to the most proficient reader in her class. That accomplishment is one hundred percent her decision and her determination. She didn’t want to be the only one reading picture books while her friends read chapter books, so she came home after parent teacher conferences, announced she was going to become a good reader, and practiced, practiced, practiced.
And now she has read all of the Harry Potter books, all of the Percy Jackson series, and a lot of other books besides. We are so proud of her. For that reason, and because eight is a special birthday in our church culture–which views eight as the “age of accountability,” an age where children have the capacity to exercise full free will–we decided to celebrate Lydia’s birthday by taking her to California.
On her actual birthday, though, Abe had to work, so we let her stay home for the morning and early afternoon to enjoy her special day.
Lydia told us this was her “golden birthday” because she is turning 8 on March 8th. I hadn’t heard of golden birthdays before but just went with it as a theme. I think she was pleased.Mary’s friend gave her a pair of fake red glasses at school, and Mary gifted them to Lydia for her birthday. Lydia was SO excited to have red glasses. When we go out in public, Mary gets comments on her glasses all the time, so I think Lydia was excited to see what would happen if she wore some too. What happened is that Lydia and Mary were super cute together!
After the presents and celebrations, the kids played while I packed and got the house ready for our trip. Then Abe came home around 2pm, we all piled in the car, and drove to the airport for our 5pm flight.
I gave Lydia a copy of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child for her birthday. She finished it before the plane ride, in part because she read as she walked.Ammon was so darling in the airport. He loves to fly. This is the last picture I took on Lydia’s birthday.
When we got to Long Beach, we rented a car and then drove to Hollywood to check into our Airbnb, which happened to be Ronald Reagan’s old apartment!!! We also got some pizza from a place nearby that looked gross but tasted so delicious.
Happy birthday, darling, wonderful Lydia! You light up my life. I adore you.
On Thursday Abe didn’t come home until after 9pm, so Liberty, our neighbor, came over so I could sneak and buy Lydia’s birthday balloons. Then I set out her presents, made sure the house was clean, and went to bed. I am back blogging so I don’t really remember much else from this day. Oh! We got Panda Express for dinner. I told Lydia she could have whatever fast food she wanted (because, sadly, I was too overwhelmed at packing and birthday planning to cook), and she chose that. I hate Panda Express, but it was Lydia’s birthday, so we got it. All of the kids wasted theirs, so I’m never doing that again. But Lydia was happy, so that’s all that matters, right?
On Wednesday Mary announced she was sick, and even though she didn’t seem at all sick to me, I let her stay home. We went to the library to pick out “sick” books for her and to attend the story times. Clarissa is crazy during story time and spends it zipping around the library, sucking on the drinking fountain, climbing stairs, and pushing elevator buttons.
On Sunday I entered Relief Society and was shocked to discover I was supposed to teach that day. The lesson was an Elder Uchtdorf talk that I had considered reading during the week but had put off because I was enjoying Portrait of a Lady so much. I should have listened to that little voice, but since I didn’t, I just split the RS into groups, had people discuss, and then just lead an informal discussion about the talk after the small group. I think it went okay. The best part was when a new member to our RS shared her experience with depression. I was so glad she was willing to be vulnerable.
Then we came home and had dinner with the Crofts. We talked with them nonstop for three hours and loved every minute. They are so intelligent and engaging. It was wonderful. And, of course, the kids love Pippa.
This morning was actually really nice in Springdale, so I went for a run. By the time I had showered and changed, though, it had started to rain. We all enjoyed our hotel breakfast before the reality sunk in. It was raining HARD, and we had driven over four hours just to be outside today.
So we bought ponchos and some more umbrellas before heading into Zion National Park. We took the shuttle to the Temple of Sinewava hike, our favorite walk with kids. It probably took Abe twenty minutes to get ponchos on everyone. (I was chasing Clarissa, who was attempting to run into all the puddles and the street.) There was a really nice guy who told us that he was living a vagrant lifestyle at the shuttle stop. He helped Ammon knot his poncho and was just a really sweet soul. We liked him a lot.
Then we hiked part of the trail. Lydia was terrified there would be a flash flood and kept asking if we were done. Mary was freezing and kept asking the same question. In contrast, Ammon and Clarissa were THRILLED. They both kept running everywhere on the trail until Abe finally picked up Clarissa and walked with her. I personally found this walk very cold and I could feel my virus getting stronger the colder I got. But Abe had a marvelous time, and I was so thrilled he was finally getting a break from his stressful routines.
A snowstorm made our return trip to Orem six hours instead of four, but Abe did an absolutely incredible job navigating it. On the way we loved listening to Vienna Teng’s “Soon, Love, Soon” and “Lullaby for a Stormy Night.”
On Friday I was a zombie from lack of sleep the night before, so everything seemed to take longer than usual. But I was really easy about pacing myself so that when Abe came home from work, I could drive most of the way to Springdale. Abe has been itching to get to the red rock, so he had scheduled Friday night at the Marriot in Springdale.
I drove almost the whole way and honestly wasn’t tired for the drive. That was amazing, considering I could hardly function in the face of laundry piles and toy messes. But I had so much fun talking, talking, talking with Abe the whole way down. About forty minutes from Springdale I petered out and Abe took over.
The room was so nice and the kids loved it. Ammon thought his trundle bed was so cool, and Clarissa, who had woken up half an hour before we reached Springdale, actually must have taken to the pack ‘n play because she went back to sleep so much easier than we expected.
Thursday was a peaceful day. Mary went to school (It was slipper day, perfect for Mary’s unicorn slippers!), but Lydia had thrown up in the middle of Wednesday night, so I kept her at home again. I couldn’t stand the thought of Ammon missing his library class, though, so we all went on that outing. Lydia was very sweet and even went to watch the toddler time puppet show. She was definitely more interested than Clarissa, who was zooming around trying to figure out how to best attach her mouth to the disgusting water fountain fixture and also taking books off of shelves.
One of my favorite parts of the day was reading my book during Clarissa’s nap while Lydia lay curled up next to me reading hers. Ammon crawled into bed with us because I guess we looked cozy.
Then at dinner to celebrate the last day of Black History Month we read several poems from Langston Hughes and discussed them with the kids. I love that my kids are old enough for these kinds of conversations! We had chicken enchiladas, salad, papaya, and jello with fruit that Abe made the night before. He was enamored with this video and enlisted the girls in the cause.
Abe played basketball in the evening and when he came back, I woke up from my late night nap and wasn’t able to fall back asleep until 5am. I spent part of the time ordering some birthday presents for Lydia and trying to figure out how best to do art history dinner discussions in the future. It was so fun.
Last night Lydia came into our room with another massive nosebleed. Sometimes her nosebleeds last almost half an hour, and during most of that time she is bleeding massively. I felt so, so sorry for her and wish there were something I could do to help alleviate her discomfort. Afterward she crawled into bed with us and slept really late. I don’t blame her–that nosebleed probably took a lot out of her.
I let the kids stay home from school again because Lydia was still feverish and lethargic, and Mary said her throat hurt. I think Mary is probably fine, but I like having her around and I feel like she doesn’t get enough free time in her normal schedule.
She also was a perfectly angelic daughter today. Both Ammon and Clarissa struggled emotionally today, and Mary read to them, played with them, and even gave Ammon a bath after he had an accident right while I was busy making dinner. Every time I asked Mary for ANYTHING (like, “Mary, could you please check the doors upstairs and make sure they’re closed so Clarissa doesn’t wander into the bedrooms?” or “Mary, could you please entertain Clarissa while I cook/clean/do laundry?” she would jump right to it with a smile the sweetest attitude. I love that girl so much.
Ammon was a nightmare and Clarissa refused to nap, so the fact that the girls were so wonderful made this day bearable.
Also, Abe was soooo amazing and gave me a long massage after the kids went to bed. He has so much going on at work and I am so grateful for how much he gives to me even when he is about to expire.
I am so tired of being sick and having the kids get sick. It was such a nice day outside, but we couldn’t enjoy it because of illness. I was scared to make the kids go on any outings because of what happened yesterday when I imposed the butterfly outing on them. Today I let them be in front of the TV all day (I feel like I’ve written that phrase in every blog for two months straight) while I cleaned, fed them, fed them, fed them, cleaned, fed them, did laundry, played with Clarissa, finished Harry Potter, and blogged.
I couldn’t run out for groceries so we had pizza for dinner, and Abe took a picture of Clarissa:
On Monday the kids had school off because of parent teacher conferences. All of the kids slept in, so Abe went to Lydia’s by himself. (Mary’s teacher was out and we have to go on a different day sometime for her.) This blog is basically private and we are writing for ourselves and our present and future family. So for those audiences, this next bit will hopefully not be off-putting, but informative and fun.
Lydia is a model student. She used to chatter in class a lot with her best friend, Grace, but the teachers separated them and that solved that. She is at a fourth grade reading level (although we thought that sounded a bit low, considering she can speed through Harry Potter books almost as fast as I can! She’s now on Percy Jackson and averages a book every two days. Maybe she’s skipping a lot of unknown vocab and got docked for accuracy…).
She’s at the top of her class in math. She is completing the multiplication unit and moving onto division. The goal for second grade is to complete the subtraction unit, which is what everyone else is doing. Her advanced state is entirely, one hundred percent due to Lydia’s own gift and effort. I have not worked on math with her since she was homeschooled, and honestly, back then I was so burnt out after reading and harp that we hardly did any math. I am too busy and burnt out to do more than ask her if she’s done her math homework, and sometimes I don’t even do that!
The teacher asked Abe and me to help her memorize her multiplication tables months ago, and both of us have never even tried. We’re always “too busy” or “too tired” or just bad parents, I guess. But Lydia, on her own, memorized her tables and is passing off that unit.
She’s also, her teachers said, extremely creative. This is definitely something we all know because in her spare time, when she isn’t reading, Lydia is ALWAYS creating things! She’s cutting out things, drawing, crafting, and sometimes even writing poetry for fun. This is a gift inherited from Abe, I feel sure.
Finally, her teachers said that whenever they ask, “Are there any questions?” Lydia always, always raises her hand. She almost never actually has a question, but she just feels some sort of primal need to respond to that question, it seems. Haha!
Abe and I were so thrilled to hear this report. It was SUCH a struggle to get Lydia to read, and I am thankful, thankful, thankful that she now has that skill. I am so grateful and amazed that she’s gifted in math. As a mom, I feel like to get my kids to achieve anything I have to put in a massive amount of blood, sweat and tears behind the scenes. It is kind of amazing and THRILLING to have Lydia achieve something remarkable without me lifting a finger! Negligence for the win!!
So after Lydia’s great report, Abe went to work and I spent the morning cleaning. Then I sat down with the kids and celebrated Black History Month with them by reading them out of Langston Hughes’ biography. I am still sick and congested, so every few paragraphs would end with me hacking, coughing, and gasping for air. But we plowed through and discussed Langston Hughes until I felt like my voice was almost gone.
Then we all sat down and watched Hidden Figures together. Mary didn’t understand the movie and was actually drawing racist conclusions about it, so I sat beside her and translated the whole thing for her. And then, to make sure those racist conclusions didn’t linger, I talked and talked and talked with my broken, raspy voice with all of the kids all the way to the Butterfly Biosphere in Lehi. I remember learning at Harvard that if you don’t actively teach kids to be anti-racist, they will organically pick up on the racist messages of our culture and unknowingly adopt racist biases and prejudices. I wish I had had more health and energy this month to celebrate black history more vigorously, but I guess all we can do is our best, right?
At the biosphere, Lydia started feeling REALLY sick. You can see it in the pictures. Soon after these were taken Lydia vomited in the lobby. She actually vomited blood and mucus everywhere because she’s been having loooong and frequent nosebleeds. It was so sad, but I couldn’t help her as much as I wanted because I was frantically running around with Clarissa on my hip trying to find/round up Mary and Ammon so we could help Lydia to the bathroom and leave. It was crazy, horrible and hectic and I felt so bad for Lydia who had to puke by herself while I was running around.
We took it really easy in the evening. Pictures (from before the puke):
bravely smiling through her pain for the camera.
One of the many things I adore about Clarissa is that she will actively take my hand and lead me wherever she wants to go. I don’t remember my other kids doing that, although it’s possible I’ve forgotten! It’s such a distinct pleasure, though, being lead around by a toddler. I love it so much. It’s hard to believe I would have forgotten this perk of motherhood.
