errands – Page 4 – Darais Days

A miracle and the aftermath

Since I suffer from social anxiety already, the addition of interpersonal friction is almost too much for me to handle. I know it’s wimpy, but I was just plain scared to go to class yesterday. I asked everyone who would listen for prayers, I put my own name on the temple roll for the first time EVER, and I even did a complete, no-cheat fast. The whole way to school I listened to KLove, and I almost called up their prayer team to pray for me. I was driving, so I thought that dialing might not be smart, but I needed all the help I could get!

While in my anxiety-ridden state, I had two helpful thoughts. 1) I started meditating on John 15. I thought about how Jesus is the vine, and even though I felt like I had absolutely no strength to handle any more friction, my connection to Christ would strengthen me and power me through whatever came my way. 2) I thought about Ezra, one of my favorite OT heroes. I thought about how he and the Jews at the River Ahava had no idea how their story would end, but they made that dangerous trip to the temple in faith. God didn’t let them down. It seems like all people of faith have to turn it over to God and trust that He will write a triumphant conclusion to their stories; yesterday was an opportunity for me to witness God do that for me (even if my situation was a result of my own anxiety and weakness).

And guess what? He DID! The first thing that happened when I got to class was the woman who yelled at me last week smiled a huge smile and greeted me warmly. Then she quietly apologized for her behavior last week. Can you believe it? Who apologizes these days? Practically no one, right? So I considered it a divine miracle, as well as an attestation of her excellent character. The rest of class was enjoyable, and I got to know her a lot better. I found out very endearing things about her, and I felt so happy to have that friction gone.

Looking back, I realize God carried me through that trial. While driving to school, I knew I didn’t have it in me to handle one more stressful interpersonal conflict with Christian love and grace, and I asked Jesus to somehow carry me through or work with me anyway. He took away the problem entirely, and so I didn’t have to deal with 1) scary conflict or 2) my own inability to handle the situation. He inspired my teammate to apologize, and he created opportunities for us to talk and connect. By the time I left, divine love for my teammate was present, natural, and flowing–all due to divine intervention. I love God and all He does for me and my petty problems. Praise Him.

Today wasn’t very dramatic, but I was very happy all day long and thought a lot about what God did for me yesterday. This morning Lydia had a swim lesson, and then we went to the grocery store and came home. Mary is teething and took a five hour nap (!), during which time I napped, cooked dinner, and baked cookies.

We own a wonderful rendition of Rapunzel wherein Rapunzel’s pregnant mother tells her husband that if he doesn’t get her some rapunzel from the sorceress’ garden, she will die. Now, I have had my share of cravings, but I always thought that line was overkill. Well, today I literally ate my words. I honestly felt that if I did not eat chocolate chip cookie dough and chocolate chip cookies, I would die! I have never made chocolate chip cookies so fast in my life, and the funny thing is, while I was madly mixing together ingredients, Lydia decided to give me an out-of-the-blue lecture on my chocolate consumption,

“Mommy, you are a chocolate mommy and you need to try new treats because chocolate is unhealthy. If you eat too much chocolate, Santa will give you coal in your stocking but he will give me, Mary, and Daddy presents. Jesus can help you not eat chocolate. Just ask Him. Remember what Daniel Tiger says? You’ve got to try new things ’cause they might taste goo-ood! See, Mommy? You need to try new things, like kisses…er, not kisses…”

“Like marshmallows, honey?”

“Yes, marshmallows! And candy canes.”

She went on and on like that for approximately half an hour. I listened to the phrase “chocolate mommy” so many times I thought she might actually think I’m part chocolate. At any rate, I was a chocolate mommy today, and I needed cookies. I’m eating another one now.

We had Wendi Rees over for dinner, but alas, I did not take a picture. Christine Hansen and her three kids were supposed to come, but they had strep. Since I had enough food prepared for seven people, I just packed up the leftovers and took them to Christine. We had a lovely visit. I stood outside the whole time because, if you’ve noticed my categories, you will notice we are not all often healthy in this house. As in, I could probably count on my fingers and toes how many days all four of us have been illness free in the past nine months. I don’t want strep in the middle of the summer on top of it all.

I do have pictures from yesterday’s class, though. Sorry, Mom and Grandma! I WILL take more pictures tomorrow!

There's a guy in our class who is a culinary genius. We were just supposed to make panna cotta, but he made a passion fruit panna cotta with a saffron sugared sauce (texture courtesy of agar). i am always in awe of his creations. He not only makes what we're supposed to make, but he creates many extra sauces each class that are all different and fantastically creative. — There’s a guy in our class who is a culinary genius. We were just supposed to make panna cotta, but he made a passion fruit panna cotta with a saffron sugared sauce (texture courtesy of agar). i am always in awe of his creations. He not only makes what we’re supposed to make, but he creates many extra sauces each class that are all different and fantastically creative.

Half of the end of class line-up. I made the panna cotta, the arancini (I just executed the creative guy's vision for the filling), the risotto, and I helped with the osso bucco. — Half of the end of class line-up. I made the panna cotta, the arancini (I just executed the creative guy’s vision for the filling), the risotto, and I helped with the osso bucco.

Here is the line-up after last week's horrible class. I made the eggplant rollatini and the pepper pasta. — Here is the line-up after last week’s horrible class. I made the eggplant rollatini and the pepper pasta. (I also learned how delicate basil is–my garnish wilted on contact with the hot plate…)

Canning with Chelsea

I had plans to work out this morning, but those dissipated in the face of housework.

Lydia and Mary played in the room while I folded laundry this morning. Lydia loves tucking Mary in, and Mary loves being tucked in. It's a good situation. — Lydia and Mary played in the room while I folded laundry this morning. Lydia loves tucking Mary in, and Mary loves being tucked in. It’s a good situation.

Last week Misty called me and told me she’d signed Sophia up for swim lessons, and that there were still empty spots left. I signed Lydia up immediately, and they had so much fun today at their first lesson.

Then we came home, ate lunch, and headed down to Orem to visit my friend, Chelsea. The last time I saw Chelsea, she gave me the best salsa I’d ever had. When I told her how much I liked it, she said she’d teach me how to make it during her next canning session. She grew everything herself, and so she cans when all the salsa veggies are ripe. They were ripe today!

We had the BEST time. The whole drive down I felt so happy and excited to spend time with Chelsea. Abe and I talked about this on the way home, and there’s just something extra special about seeing a friend you’ve known in your pre-adult life. I don’t have any of those out here in Utah except for Chelsea, and I feel really happy whenever I get to spend time with her (not often enough).

If spending time with Chelsea weren’t enough, my eyes were also opened today about the possibilities of living in Orem. Chelsea lives exactly eight minutes from Abe’s work, so when he was done I picked him up and we went back to Chelsea and Derek’s house and had amazing Thai food for dinner. Chelsea and Derek loaded us up with canned and fresh produce, and we left feeling so happy, grateful, and blessed. I asked Abe how soon he thought we could sell our condo so we could buy a house near Chelsea and Derek…

Olivia has approximately twenty princess dresses. Lydia changed her dress every ten minutes for the first hour we were there.

Picking strawberries in Chelsea's strawberry patch. — Picking strawberries in Chelsea’s strawberry patch.

London and Olivia. London is a really, really child friendly dog. — London and Olivia. London is an exceptionally well-trained, child friendly dog.

Watching London interact with the children.

Eating dinner/chips and salsa for dinner. They loved the salsa!

In front of Chelsea's AMAZING garden. I love Chelsea, I love her garden, I love this visit...basically, I want to move to Orem right away. — In front of Chelsea’s AMAZING garden. I love Chelsea, I love her garden, I love this visit…basically, I want to move to Orem right away.

Afterward, we headed to the outlets to buy pajamas for Lydia. We’ve spent six months in denial about her pj situation, and it’s finally reached the point where we’ve come to admit: she needs new ones. She spends half the week in her 2T pjs which barely come past her knees. During out outing, we discovered princess pajama dresses. Whoever came up with that must have had Lydia and Mary in mind. I kind of think all the other pj’s we bought might not even get used now that wearing a princess dress to bed is an option. The girls fell asleep before we got home, so I’ll take pictures of the princess pj dress tomorrow.

August Saturday

Today Abe and I both felt sapped of energy, but I still enjoyed the morning. I may not be quitting culinary school, but there’s no need to be a glutton for pain: I AM quitting the competition team, and I have zero qualms about it. I enjoyed my school-free morning treeee-mendously.

Abe took Lydia to ballet while I took Mary on my errands.

en route to ballet. — En route to ballet.

Abe took the girls to the park while I cooked meals for a couple families in the ward.

At the park in what Lydia calls "the clubhouse." — At the park in what Lydia calls “the clubhouse.”

After I delivered the meals, we went on a sloooow bike ride to and around the cemetery. Cemeteries are some of my favorite places, and the Salt Lake Cemetery is gorgeous. We live right by it, and I can’t believe I don’t go there more often.

Lydia fell asleep on the ride and basically never woke up. We were afraid to wake her without some sort of imminent treat because she is SO grumpy after late naps, so we woke her at 8 pm, force fed her some ice cream, and put her straight back to bed. I don't even know if she realized she ate the ice cream...she was falling over into Abe's lap between bites. — Lydia fell asleep on the ride and basically never woke up. We were afraid to wake her without some sort of imminent treat because she is SO grumpy after late naps, so we woke her at 8 pm, force fed her some ice cream, and put her straight back to bed. I don’t even know if she realized she ate the ice cream…she was falling over into Abe’s lap between bites.

Since Lydia was asleep, Mary got to be an only child for the evening. Abe and I lay down on the grass and played with her for an hour. We were all in heaven. I didn't want it to end, but finally it got dark, and I realized I'd have to put my adorable baby to bed. She was so, so fun to play with. — Since Lydia was asleep, Mary got to be an only child for the evening. Abe and I lay down on the grass and played with her for an hour. We were all in heaven. I didn’t want it to end, but finally it got dark, and I realized I’d have to put my adorable baby to bed. She was so, so fun to play with. She does this cute thing where she wrinkles her face, tilts her head and makes her voice high and nasally for certain words like, “Meow!” “Oh no!” and “Miss Nana!” (I miss Nana!)

Abe and I are about to watch a movie. Shirley and Jon are in town and going to come over around 11 pm. We missed seeing them in New York, and their Salt Lake trips are always packed, so we take them whenever we we can get them. We’re so excited to see them soon!

Day WORST at cooking school and the aftermath

Yesterday was the absolute worst day at cooking school I have ever had. I got yelled at by a teammate, and the chef almost completely lost it at me multiple times. I came home feeling so sick and upset that Abe ended up giving me a blessing at 1:30 am, and then I only slept three hours after that. It was terrible. I would love to quit, but I know sticking with it will build character…so I’m gritting my teeth and going forward, even though this feels like a masochistic exercise.

But I feel better today. Honestly, I spent most of the morning imagining what I should have said to my teammate, and that actually helped me feel better and move on. I actually don’t hold anything against her, but it felt therapeutic to think out an appropriate verbal response to her random, loud verbal attack last night.

Also, I was grateful to be on the receiving end of both just and unjust yelling. It made me resolve with more determination than ever that I will not yell at my children. I sat Lydia down this morning and explained everything that happened last night and why I am sorry I have yelled at her in the past. I then told her I was going to try very, very hard not to yell ever again, but if I did slip, I instructed her to say, “Mommy, your yelling makes me feel sad and scared. Please stop.” I hope this plan works. After the pain of last night, I just can’t bear the thought of my children feeling that degraded and inhuman.

So today was a success! I was more patient than I have ever been in the history of my own parenting, and the kids, for the most part, responded with excellent behavior. I pray, pray, pray God helps me keep this resolve.

We woke up and played princess for forty-five minutes before breakfast. The girls were so excited about their Disney gifts from Tom and Suzanne!

I played with my kids a TON today. I was trying to make up for every parental mistake I've ever made...this is "Row, Row Your Boat" in a laundry basket boat. — I played with my kids a TON today. I was trying to make up for every parental mistake I’ve ever made…this is “Row, Row Your Boat” in a laundry basket boat.

After taking the girls to the library and grocery store, we came home. I played play-doh with Lydia for half an hour. Ever since Abe’s FHE, she likes to play “Amalikiah and Moroni’s walls.” In her version, a snake kills Amalikiah–and then a frog kills a snake.

We also had some Primary teachers over for dinner. Actually, Abe used to home teach Lisa and Dustin, so he was extremely excited when he found out which teachers were coming.

Row, row your — Me, Mary, Cathy, and Lisa. I have resolved to photograph at least the people who come over to dinner, because when I review my past blogs quickly, it helps me get a better sense of each day’s events.

911

At 5:54 am I awoke to the sound of the front door slamming. Abe leaves for work at 5:30 these days, and so I was terrified that someone was in the house. I crept to the stairs and heard light switches going on and off in the house. Convinced there was someone inside, I called 911.

Twenty minutes later, a team of six policemen swarmed the house, only to discover…nothing. I felt so dumb. But I honestly did hear the door slam, and I heard another door slam right before the police arrived. Since Abe and I are missing two full sets of keys, we had all the locks changed today just to be safe. Abe has promised to deadbolt the door behind him when he leaves for work.

To be honest, I still haven’t quite recovered from the adrenaline rush that accompanied lying in bed whispering on the phone with 911 for twenty minutes. It was terrible. I haven’t felt safe since. Also, I’m stressed out that I call 911 so much. This was my fourth call in two and a half years. If I operated 911, I would stop responding to my number’s calls. “Oh, it’s just the hystrionic lady in the Avenues who always thinks she’s under attack. Let’s respond to someone who actually NEEDS help…”

The only times I’ve forgotten the scare today were 1) visiting teaching Marilyn this morning and 2) having dinner with my mission friend, Jen! She’s from France, but her husband is American and they’ve been living in D.C. for the past five years. Jen was a director at Miriam’s kitchen during that time, and the experiences she shared uplifted us so much. We were so inspired by Jen and Chris’s passion for community and homeless-outreach.

Now that they’ve moved to Salt Lake, I’m looking forward to spending more time with Jen. She was also mission companions in Las Vegas with one of Abe’s high school friends, and so for our next get together we’re going to invite the Maudsleys over for dinner and let Katie and Jen reconnect. It’s been almost ten years since our missions!

Here’s a photo Abe took at the end of dinner. Chris was also taking pictures, and Jen and I are each looking at our hubby’s phone.

cookies, cub scout car wash, ballet, party, nap, Sharon, carnival, walk, groceries: July Saturday or The Longest Title Ever

This morning I set my alarm early so I could bake cookies for the cub scout car wash. Then Abe took Ada and Lydia to ballet while Mary and I headed over to dry some cars. I was scared to put Mary down near the cars, so I carried her while I dried and called it my work-out o’the day.

Then it was time for Liv’s birthday party at Liberty Park (by the Seven Canyons splash pad/rivers).

Abe had fun driving the girls around in Paige and Mike's bike. Isn't it amazing? — Abe had fun driving the girls around in Paige and Mike’s bike. Isn’t it amazing?

After we came home and napped, our friend Sharon Harris joined us for dinner. I didn’t take any pictures during dinner because every second with Sharon was precious. She’s from New York and has spent a couple weeks in Utah for the Neal A. Maxwell symposium. We were so glad to see her, even though the time flew by.

After dinner Tom and Suzanne took the girls to a Miner family party while Abe and I stayed home and did homework and lesson prep. We also took a beautiful walk to the grocery store. The sun was setting and the weather was gorgeous. We saw a neighbor slow dancing to Jazz music with his garden hose. That was truly delightful.

The Miners’ had a carnival of sorts going on because so many family members were in town.

Everyone had to wear shower caps covered in shaving cream. After the Cheeto fight, whoever was covered in the most cheetos won.

Then it was home to bed. I have an early morning meeting tomorrow, so I should get to bed. Abe’s already asleep!

Sprinklers and Abe anecdotes

This morning we picked up Rose, Taina and Sev and headed over to Nordstrom to pick out some $12 sunglasses. I lose approximately two pairs per summer, and Rose offered to help me pick some. She did a great job, and I am so happy to not be squinting now!

Then we came home, ran through the sprinklers, and had a picnic.

Rose engineered our hose so that it could stay put like a sprinkler.

Mary was afraid of the sprinklers. Therefore, she hung on to me for dear life and didn't appear in any of the sprinkler shots. — Mary was afraid of the sprinklers. Therefore, she hung on to me for dear life and didn’t appear in any of the sprinkler shots.

After naps, Isabella came so I could go swimming and grocery shopping. Then we all ate outside before heading to Baskin Robbins to celebrate the start of the weekend.

Isabella-- Spiderman 2 flavored ice cream (chocolate and colored vanilla with exploding candy bits); Lydia--Very Berry Strawberry; Abe--Gold Medal; Mary--chocolate chip cookie dough; Lily--Mint Chocolate Chip. — Isabella– Spiderman 2 flavored ice cream (chocolate and colored vanilla with exploding candy bits); Lydia–Very Berry Strawberry; Abe–Gold Medal; Mary–chocolate chip cookie dough; Lily–Mint Chocolate Chip. I should also not that this Baskin Robbins is where my visiting teachee, Marilyn, had her first date with her husband many decades ago. It’s stood the test of time!

Afterward, we went to Smith’s to pick out a toy for Liv’s birthday party tomorrow. Abe became passionately attached to a farm toy and went to elaborate lengths to convince me it was the perfect toy. I was convinced. We bought it.

Oh! I forgot to write down a funny thing that happened on Wednesday. We had gone down to Provo to hear Sharon’s talk, and we got lost. It took us forever to find the JFSB (one of the Joseph Smith buildings). Everyone kept saying, “It’s the one with the blue windows–you can’t miss it!” …and Abe and I kept missing it. All of the BYU campus buildings seem to have blue windows. Abe noted that they might have well said, “It’s the building with WALLS–you can’t miss it!”

Anyway, once we got to the building, we wandered all over until we finally found the symposium room. Afterward, as we attempted to navigate the maze out, Abe cried, “Oh, look! A street!!” in the same tone that one might use when saying, “Oh, look! We’re there!!”

This might be the place to note that while my sense of direction is far from stellar, Abe sometimes makes me feel like a professional navigator. That was one of those moments. I took his hand and gently led him back to the car (which was in the opposite direction of the street). We laughed the whole way there.

Also, I wish I could post a picture of Abe’s photo for his public transit pass. I haven’t seen him smile like that for a photo since our wedding day. He is definitely very happy to be free of his drive–he actually jumped out of bed at 5:40 am this morning to make his train. Abe is NOT a morning person, so again: More evidence that what he said tonight must be at least partly true. “Honey, without that drive, every second of my life feels enjoyable!!”

I heart Abe.

Funny exchanges, Sharon’s paper, and missing cats.

Today we started off early by heading over to Red Butte Gardens with Rose, Taina and Sev.

And then Paige was wonderful and watched the girls until their babysitter came an hour later. Yesterday I forgot to write down something funny Lydia said before Ada came over. Lydia is very conscious about what she wears in public, and she’s refused to appear in public with any pants that have holes in them. (Responding to my exasperation with tears streaming down her face: “But Mommy, what if someone sees the holes in my pants??”) She happened to be wearing a pair of holey pants before Ada came, and she ran into my room right before Ada arrived saying, “Mommy, I need to change my pants so Ada doesn’t think I’m a dorphan (orphan)!”

Anyway, today I drove down to Provo to see my friend, Sharon Harris, speak at the Neal A. Maxwell symposium. She delivered a brilliant paper on singles wards and her solution to current retention problems of older single adults. (Change some infantilizing terms, scale back the transition age to “conventional” wards to 25, etc. Her full paper will be posted online after the symposium concludes.)

Then I came home, went shopping with the girls, and came home and cooked dinner.

Lydia in full princess regalia before dinner.

We ate outside. In the summer we sometimes go on Tofurkey dog kicks, and tonight we had Tofurkey dogs. Lydia announced they looked like poop and refused to eat hers. After a while, she closely observed how I ate mine with gusto, and then asked, “Mommy, can I eat some of your poop?” We might have died laughing.

Afterward Abe took them to the park while I ate s’mores and cleaned up.

A really sad thing happened just now. Lydia told me that she took Puss and Casper (her two cats that she sleeps with and LOVES) outside to play in the sprinklers with Ada. She never brought them back inside, and now we can’t find them. I asked her why she did that after I’d told her not to, and she tearfully replied, “Mommy, I did it because Puss wuvs (loves) to be siwwy (silly) and Casper reawwy wanted to pway (play)!” I felt so sorry for her. We said a prayer that we’d find them, and now I really do hope we find them.

Lily = Laman and/or Lemuel. =(

We had a rough start to the day because we were up almost all night last night. Mary woke up because of all the commotion in her unairconditioned room (Harley was scared of the air conditioner) and proceeded to spend the rest of the night wide awake in bed with me. She can’t sleep when she’s hot.

This morning I didn’t realize Lydia’s ballet class started at 9:30 and she missed it. That was also sad.

Dancing before we realized my timing error.

We ended up just taking the kids to the park since my house was getting completely destroyed with four kids here. I wish I weren’t so up tight! But it’s honestly so hard for me to watch everything I JUST cleaned get dirty, not to mention furniture get outright abused. I also thought the incessant whining going on would drive me out of my mind, and my only shot at sanity was getting some air. Maybe I was a little edgy because of the sleepless night, too.

Yes, I wore that yesterday and slept in it. I would still be wearing it and might wake up dressed for church tomorrow if I hadn't gotten chocolate all over it at dinner. Darn. Usually my same-outfit-three/four-days-in-a-row streaks happen in the winter, but I guess they're starting to occur in other seasons now. — Yes, I wore that yesterday and slept in it. I would still be wearing it and might wake up dressed for church tomorrow if I hadn’t gotten chocolate all over it at dinner. Darn. Usually my same-outfit-three/four-days-in-a-row streaks happen in the winter, but I guess they’re starting to occur in other seasons now.

I fervently wish I were a better person. I’ve spent the whole day feeling sure that I’m exactly like Laman and Lemuel. When Abe tried to protest, I pointed out that Laman and Lemuel actually made the journey to the Promised Land, but they murmured and complained the whole way there. I might be executing deeds that seem good, but sometimes my heart and my mouth are sooooo not there. At this point, I wish I were a murmurer–that would be so much better than a LOUD complainer. See? I’m still complaining, and the ordeal ended ten hours ago.

After we dropped the kids off at noon, I came home and called my mom. Mom, you’re the best listener. Thank-you for listening to me vent.

We then proceeded to take a looooooooooong nap. Mary slept four hours, Abe slept three, and I slept almost two.

Lydia did not sleep. She spent the whole time playing pretend by herself. Here she is in her Elsa cape. Ever since I gave her that cape and she realized Elsa’s clothing items are on the market, she has been asking God in her prayers for everything else Elsa wears. For good measure, she’s also repeatedly requested I write Santa a letter with the same request.

I then did a project that’s due today for my online nutrition class. When that was in, we piled into the car to go swimming.

After swimming, we used a Groupon I had to go get Thai food.

Then we came back home to our destroyed house. After putting the girls down, Abe and I just lay in the rubble for a while contemplating all the work we need to do to clean up. I’m blogging instead of cleaning. Maybe my time has come…

Just one more picture, though. Mary has a cat named Twinkie, but she calls it “Pinky Winky.” Here she is with Twinkie-Pinky-Winky.

super short

Mom and Grandma, I’m sorry that this is so short and doesn’t include the pictures we talked about on the phone today. We are babysitting some children who haven’t seen their mom since Wednesday, and it has been a little crazy. The poor little girl basically moaned “I want my mommy” over and over again until she finally fell asleep at midnight. Abe and I tried to comfort her, but to no avail. Lydia is currently awake because they’re all sleeping in the same room. I’m contemplating how I can sneak their window open since the air conditioner scared Harley (the little girl), so I had to turn it off.

Here’s the only picture we took today:

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