Day 3 in Bora Bora

We started today just like we started yesterday with a hearty workout. I backed mine off a little because of how tired I was feeling, but Lily did both a hard elliptical workout and a rowing workout. She really went for it.

As mentioned, I felt tired this morning and was kindof grumpy, but we had a pleasant time at breakfast talking to Eric and Sarah, a couple from Michigan we met on the boat-ride over, who invited us to join them for breakfast. Eric works at Ford and we all covered a lot of topics including cars and trucks :). Here is a picture of the fish swimming right under/next to us at breakfast. They gave us fish food to give them and that was a very fun simple pleasure. Also, I’ll note the breakfasts here have been amazing. I love all the fresh fruit especially.

After breakfast, I cured my grumpiness by resting a solid hour on the beach until I felt better and happier. I still feel a lot of deep recovering happening and I’m so grateful for every day I get to be here with Lily.

After resting, I finished my book, Falling Upward, by Richard Rhor. It is literally one of the best books I have read in my entire life and it has been a sure stepping stone in my own spiritual journey. Below is a summary of my key takeaways from the book:

In short, Falling Upward describes the fall from the garden of Eden that many people have in their midlife. This is the journey from the first half of life (governed by rules, achievement orientation, ego and identity building etc ) to the second half of life (filled with uncertainty, peace, freedom, sorrow, joy, freedom, and wisdom). He suggests that most people will not take a journey willingly into their second half of life because of how scary and painful it is, so most people have to fall into it through a crisis, and that is a very fortunate crisis indeed because people might never fully mature spiritually if they get stuck in their first half of life (never become true Elders, as Richard Rhor puts it). My fortunate crisis was Lily leaving the church, and the launch of my own entrance into ambiguity and questioning. This book gives assurances, principles, and guidelines for entering the second half of life. Some of my favorite takeaways are:

  • Dualisting or black-and-white thinking only belongs in the first half of life.
  • In the second half of life you are able to embrace and hold life’s complexities and paradoxes with with love and grace and find creative tension and not anxiety or the need to eliminate people or things that complicate your world view.
  • The second half of life can be lonely, but you will feel free and filled in solitude as you find and feel comfortable in your true self.
  • Our first life builds up our illusion identity which is useful to give ourselves a container, but in the second half of life we find our true identity and the love and Gaze of God which can fill our container, expand our minds and guide our actions.
  • The first half of life is about my dance, the second half of life is in finding joy in joining the general dance regardless of my role. It is about giving, not receiving. It is about my place in the fabric, not being a special thread.

I actually feel like I’m butchering a lot of the teachings, but the book truly spoke to me.

After finishing the book, Lily and I had a wonderful lunch and then headed back to our room to cool off. On the way, Lily wanted me to capture just how glorious and green the water is:

Back at our hotel room, I blogged for a couple of hours while Lily read and then we caught a boat to go to the St. Regis for the Q-club dinner reception.

It was a wonderful time. We had great a conversation with Benji and Aubrey Wohan about schooling. We also talked to Lucas and Kim and had a really good time talking to Mark and Stacey Creer and learned that we were in the Evanston ward at the same time. We talked to many other wonderful people and had a great time and enjoyed very good food. Now it’s time to get some rest so I can get up in time for the shark tour tomorrow.

Oh, also I won a gopro from the raffle! Thanks God!